For you now
by Butterflysparkle97
Summary: Grey- Sloan intern Josephine Wilson wants just one thing in life, and that's to break free from her Husband Paul. But when she finds herself pregnant, can the team at Grey- Sloan help Jo face the darkest days of her life?
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** For you now

 **Plot:** Grey- Sloan intern Josephine Wilson wants just one thing in life, and that's to break free from her Husband Paul. But when she finds herself pregnant, can the team at Grey- Sloan help Jo face the darkest days of her life?

Hey everyone! So, this is an idea I had a few months ago now after watching the movie 'waitress'.

I have used some scenes from the movie in some chapters, (such as this first chapter) however have changed them up to suit grey's anatomy and Jo's situation. In this story there is an intern who was never on the show, her name is Jenna and if I'm honest she doesn't really appear too much in the story (as I kept forgetting about her, oops) however she was vital, especially in this first chapter.

Steph and Jenna are the only people at the hospital who know about Jo's situation with Paul and they have known each other since Med school. Also, Jo is quite a depressed character in this story, as she is a woman who is in a terrible situation and I highly doubt she'd be perky and happy about it.

If you have any questions about the story please let me know.

I hope you all enjoy and don't forget to review! They make me so much more motivated to write.

Lost of love and happiness to you all!

 **Chapter one**

"Come on Jo, you've put it off for long enough," Steph says as she and Jenna stand in the doorway of the intern locker room at Grey Sloan memorial.

"I know, I know," Jo sighs as she looks down at the floor of the locker room.

"You need to find out. The sooner you know the better," Jenna instructs.

All three girls stood in the bathroom of the locker room. They had locked the door of the locker room to make sure that nobody could interrupt them, that was the last thing they needed.

"Negative, negative, come on!" Jo begs. Her heart beats heavy in her chest as she waits for the results. She did not want this pregnancy, in fact, it was the last thing on this world that she wanted.

The miracle of life was supposed to be a happy one. A baby was to be born into a family with two parents who loved it and two parents who loved each other. That was not going to be this baby's life.

She didn't love him... her husband. She hated him with every ounce of her being and he didn't love her, but he did love abusing her and controlling her. Thinking about what he likes to do with her sent a chilling shiver down her spine.

"Please protect Jo from the world of unwanted pregnancy," Steph begs as she crosses her fingers and paces back and forth.

"I don't need a baby. I don't want any trouble. I just want to be a doctor, that's all I want," Jo says as she stares at the tiny stick she held tightly in her hands.

"I thought you weren't sleeping with your husband anymore?" Jenna asks.

"He got her drunk one night," Steph interjects.

"I should never drink. I do stupid bings when I drink, like sleep with my husband," Jo groans. "Oh no!" Jo gasps, "looks like a pink line is forming. Shit."

"One line or two lines?" Jenna asks curiously.

"Two lines. The control line and the other line. The bad line. The Yes line," Jo sighs as she holds the pregnancy test up for Steph and Jenna to see.

"Two lines, there's no mistaking that, there's two lines," Steph confirms.

"What the hell is going on in there! Some of us need to use the lockers!" Leah shouts out as she bangs on the door.

"Cool it, we're coming!" Jenna shouts back.

Jo tosses the pregnancy stick into the bin beside her and stands up, "where are you going?" Steph asks.

"I'm on Dr Grey's service. I'm going to work. I need to work... I can't do this Okay, not right now," Jo replies. She walks over to the door and unlocks it. She opens it and sees Leah standing outside on a huff. "Sorry," Jo scoffs as she walks out.

 **Scene break**

"Dr Grey, Dr Grey," Jo calls out as she rushes after Meredith, who was busy walking towards the consult rooms on floor two.

Meredith stops walking and turns around. Jo smiles and stops walking. "Yes Dr Stadler?"

"I... I'm on your service," Jo announces.

Meredith looks down at her watch, "You're ten minutes late," she scolds.

"I know, I'm sorry. It... it won't happen again," Jo stutters as she takes two steps back. She was flustered. She was scolded enough at home, she didn't need it here and she hated it when it did happen.

Meredith looks at her oddly. Jo appeared flustered, afraid even. She didn't think she was that harsh. "Alright then, let's go," Meredith says with a nod of the head.

"What have we got?" Jo asks as they begin to walk.

"Lina Parge, 38. She's here for a laparotomy," Meredith explains. Jo nods her head and they enter the room. Jo glances at her chart and presents. Upon giving satisfactory answers Meredith instructs Jo to prepare her for surgery.

"Hon, are you okay?" Lina asks as Jo takes her BP.

Jo glances at Lina and gives a tiny smile, "Ah, Yes."

"When one of my children lie to me I tell them to try again," she says. Jo looks down at the floor quickly.

That was one of the last things Jo wanted to happen. If a woman she met five minutes ago could tell something was wrong then her husband sure as hell would, and that couldn't happen.

"I'm fine," Jo reassures her.

 **Scene break**

The noise clutter in the lunch room was almost too much for Jo to handle as her mind was working over time elsewhere.

"I never going to get away from Paul now," she says to Steph as she looks into the distance.

"Are going to tell him?" Steph asks as she looks at Jo sympathetically.

"I'm not sure," Jo says with a small shake of the head.

"If my plan comes true, I can make my big escape from him in a couple months and he doesn't ever have to know," Jo musses.

"Jo..." Steph begins sympathetically.

"No Steph, I know what you're gonna say and I'm not sure I want to hear it. Just for once Steph, just for once in my life I want to see the light. I'm surrounded by darkness and it consumes me. So just for once in my life I'd like to believe that my big plan is going to work... that I'm going to be free of him," Jo begs.

"I was going to ask you how you were feeling," Steph replies.

"Oh," Jo replies embarrassed about her little outburst.

"Josephine! Josephine!" A voice calls out.

Jo looks around and sees Paul walking towards them.

"What is he doing here?" Steph asks.

"Shit, I don't know," Jo panics. Her heart was racing. Paul approaches them and stands next to Jo, "Hi Paul."

"You don't look happy to see me? Are you happy to see me?" He questions sternly.

"Yeah, I'm happy to see you," Jo says as she forces a smile.

"You didn't give me a kiss," he says unhappily as Jo looks at him. "Well, give me one," he instructs. Jo hesitantly gives him a kiss. "Now. We've gotta go."

"I'm at work, I can't just go Paul," Jo replies back. "I... I have surgery in an hour and Dr Grey is expecting me to round on her patients beforehand."

Paul looks at Jo with anger built up in his face. "You can go because I said you can go. Now stand up," he orders. Jo continues to sit down in her seat. "Mrs Stadler, you stand up right now or you'll regret this choice later," he warns.

"I'm sorry," Jo sighs. As she stand up from her chair.

"Say it like you mean it Josephine," he warns.

"I'm sorry, Paul," Jo says with a small smile.

"That's more like it. Now, let's get you home," he orders.

Paul takes Jo's hand and directs her out of the lunch room. As he does Jo looks back at Steph. "I'm sorry," Steph mouths to Jo.

They walk in silence through the busy halls of the hospital. As they do Jo looks around, takes in her surroundings and watches them disappear.

"Who's that man Dr Stadler is with?" April curiously asks Arizona as they stand in the hospital lobby watching Jo and Paul walk by.

"I don't know. But she's married. Her husband maybe?" Arizona replies casually.

"He's hot. She did well." April grins.

"Hey, hey, Kepner. Eyes up here honey, you're married," Arizona says as she points to her eyes.

"And Matthew and I are just as in love as the day we got married," April confirms.

"You and Matthew are approaching two years of marriage and you have a really, really, really cute baby, so I hope so" Arizona laughs.

 **Scene break**

"Now, where is that pay check of yours?" Paul asks Jo as he begins to navigate his Audi Q7 out of the parking structure.

"In my purse," Jo says as she looks straight out of the car.

"Well, now, hand it over," he instructs. He holds out his right hand. Jo opens up her purse and pulls out her check. She hands it to him and he glances down at the dollar amount and looks at it disgustingly. "Not much here, is there?"

"I'm an intern," Jo replies.

"Yeah, Well, I'm really not sure it's worth you working anymore," he looks over at her with a grin, " I think I'd rather have you at home cooking and cleaning. We'd save a fortune on the Maids you know?" He replies.

"I like working Paul. I get to save lives. You're a leading world class neurosurgeon and researcher, surly you understand the pull?" Jo questions carefully.

"You didn't ask me how my day was," he states plainly. Jo could hear how annoyed his voice was becoming.

"How was your day?" She asks.

"You didn't sound like you meant it. Ask me like you mean about it," he orders.

"How was your day, Paul?" Jo asks with a slight smile.

"Well, research is going well and we're starting phase two of the clinical trial tomorrow," Paul begins as Jo stares into the distance. She couldn't care less about his day. His day meant nothing to her but yet she had to pretend to care. She had to act like he was the best person in the world.

Paul looks over at her, "You're not listening to me," he says as he takes the right hand turn out of the hospital car park and onto the main road.

"Yeah, I am," Jo rebuts.

"What did I say?" He asks smugly.

"You were talking about the clinical trial," she replies as they pull up to a set of red traffic lights.

"What were the exact words I said?" He says while giving Jo a glaring look.

"Well, I mean, I can't repeat every..."

"You didn't listen to me! It Hurts my feelings. Please just say you're sorry so I can let you out this car, so you can love me," Paul interrupts.

"I'm sorry for not being able to repeat your words Paul. It's something I should be able to do," Jo replies sadly.

"All right then," Paul says as they take off from the traffic light.

Jo remains silent for the rest of the way home and deep in through about what this baby meant for her. How was she ever going to get away from Paul now that she was pregnant? She had been saving for a long time to try and get away from him, but now all of the money was going to have to be used for the baby because Paul sure as hell wouldn't want to spend his money on one. Her life was a disaster and she was spiralling deeper down its its trap with no hope... no way out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two**

 **That night**

 **Once again some of these scenes are from the movie 'waitress' and I've modified some scenes to suit my story.**

 **Also, I know that Alex being Jo's OB would never happen in real life, especially considering he is in Paeds, but let's just roll with it. I needed Alex to be involved in Jo's pregnancy in a medical capacity.**

 **Sending you all love and happiness and I hope that you enjoy this chapter.**

The dinning room was brightly lit with 7 decorative candles placed in the centre of their wooden dining table. The vanilla sent wafting around the room from the burning candles were pleasant. Jo walks into the dinning room holding two plates of roast beef and veg in her hands. She sets one down in front of Paul, who was sitting at the head of the table and then proceeds to sit down on his right side with her plate.

"You look handsome tonight Pauly" Jo compliments.

"Thank you honey," Paul replies slightly shocked. "It's been a long time since

you called me that. I like it," Paul says with a firm nod of the head. "And you look pretty tonight, maybe a little tired, that's all." Paul picks up his fork and takes a bite of his roast beef.

"I'm not sleeping well," Jo says brushing the statement aside. Being tired, that was a pregnancy symptom. Surly she wasn't far enough along to start showing fatigue, was she?

"You're not eating your roast beef. Why not?" Paul asks. He places his fork down on his plate and the clink of it hitting the glass fills the room.

"I'm thinking that I want to borrow some money from you," Jo pipes up.

"And my answer to that, of course, is no," Paul replies with a glaring look.

"There is a medical conference down south that I'd like to go to. It's focussing on Paediatric emergency medicine and surgery, and I'd like to go," Jo replies. As much as she was trying to remain calm, the excitement in her voice was building up

"And my answer to that, is no," Paul replies simply.

 **Scene break**

 **The next day**

"Josephine Stadler?" A young man questions as he walks into the exam room of Grey Sloan Memorial that Jo was sitting in. She was sitting on the exam table and dressed in a hospital exam gown.

"That's me," Jo says with a smile. "And Who are you?" She questions. He was not the doctor she was expecting to see.

"I'm your doctor, Dr Karev. I'm a Paediatric fellow," Alex replies. He places her file on the counter and takes a seat.

"You're not my doctor. Dr Louise Fuller is my doctor. You're not her and i would like to see her," Jo points out. She sits on the exam table with her hands placed on her lap.

"She is very sick at the moment," Alex replies.

"You're a paediatric fellow. Gynaecology is not the same thing," Jo replies assertively.

"No, it's not. And I'll admit that gynaecology isn't an area I've work in since i completed my residency last year, But I'm perfectly capable. If I wasn't able to, or if the hospital hand any doubts then I wouldn't be here," Alex replies. He looks at her curiously, he had the feeling that he had seen her somewhere before. Do I know you? Or have I seen you before?"

"I'm an intern. You've probably seen me around. I recognise seeing you in passing," Jo replies.

"Well, it's nice to formally meet you," Alex smiles, "So... What seems to be the problem?"

"Well, I seem to be pregnant," Jo says blankly.

"Congratulations," Alex replies.

"Thanks, but I don't want this baby," Jo replies blankly.

"Oh, well, I don't perform... uh..." Alex begins to stutter. Her response caught him off guard.

"No, I'm keeping it, I'm just telling you I'm not so happy about it, like somebody else might be," Jo replies. "It's not a big deal. I'm having the baby and that's that."

"Uh, well, we'll do a blood test, to confirm that you're pregnant and we'll take it from there," Alex replies.

 **Scene break**

"Hey Robbins, I need to chat to you real quick," Alex says after he walks over to Arizona, who was standing at the nurses station chatting to nurse Jenkins.

"Struggling in gynaecology? I'm sorry, but there was no one else who could cover her so you're just going to have to deal with it," Arizona replies.

"Okay, not at all what I was going to ask, but it's good to clear that up," Alex confirms.

"Oh, well, you're welcome. What's up then?" She quires.

"This morning I had a patient, Josephine Stadler. She's an intern here," Alex begins.

"Ah Yes, Dr Stadler," Arizona nods.

"Something seemed off. She came in suspecting that she was pregnant but she wasn't the happiest about it," Alex explains.

"Well, Karev, I hate to break it to you, but having a baby isn't a happy thing for everyone. I once never wanted children," Arizona reminds him.

Alex nods his head, "But this just seems like more then that. Like something else isn't quite right. I just can't put my finger onto it."

"A feeling that something isn't quite right isn't proof of that unfortunately. I have surgery so I need to go prep but just keep an eye on her," Arizona suggests. Alex sighs and nods his head.

 **That afternoon**

Jo sighs and knocks on Alex's door. "Come in," he prompts.

Alex looks up from his chart and see's Jo standing in his doorway, "Hi Jo, have a seat."

"This is a nice office," Jo compliments as she sit's down.

"Ah, thank you. Not every attending receives an office. I'm just lucky," He replies. Jo nods her head softly.

"What did my blood work say?" Jo asks with a sigh.

"You are pregnant," He replies.

Jo looks down at the ground and shakes her head, "Great, just great. how am I supposed to get away now?" she mutters softly.

"Pardon?" Alex replies.

Jo looks back up at him, "Sorry, just talking to myself. Now, how far along am I?" she questions.

"Ah yes, now that was going to be my next thing. The elevated HGC presence in your blood work indicate that you are around 16 weeks," he states.

"That was the night Paul got me drunk alright," she sighs.

"How long have you suspected that you were pregnant?" he asks.

"A few months I just put it off you know, I didn't want it to be true," she replies honestly.

"Well, okay," Alex pauses for a moment, "If you don't want to raise a baby then adoption could be an option?"

Jo shakes her head, "My husband would never agree to that." Paul wouldn't want to have a baby, but he also wouldn't want to give one away. This baby would be a power hold. Something to keep her within arms length of his life and within his control. Adopting the baby would eliminate all of the extra control over her he soon would have.

"Seeing as you are so far along I'd like to do a ultrasound and run a few blood tests just to make sure that everything is progressing as it should. Would you like to wait for your husband?" Alex requests.

"No," Jo shakes her head.

"Okay then, If you'd like to follow me then we can go ahead and get that done now," he replies, he stands up and Jo follows him down the hallway to an exam room.

Jo changes into a hospital gown and waits on the exam table for Alex to return to the room. When he enters the room he is followed by Arizona.

"Dr Robbin's? What are you doing here" Jo questions.

"Jo, Hi. I'm just here to assist Dr Karev. We need to be thorough with this scan seeing as you are so far alone and a second pair of eyes will only help," she explains.

Jo nods her head and lays down on the table and Alex began the ultrasound. The baby measured at be 16 weeks and 6 days. Upon hearing that everything looked okay she got changed and Alex went ahead and drew two vials of blood from Jo's left arm.

"We will get these down to the lab and we should have the results by tomorrow," Alex says.

"Okay, Thank you," Jo sighs. She stands up and leaves the room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three**

Once again there is so parts of this chapter inspired by the movie 'waitress'. I've re written it to suit grey's. I think this is the last chapter that does so.

 **The same day**

Jo walks down the hallway with Steph and Jenna when she hears her phone ring. She picks it up out of her pocket and notices Paul's caller I.D and as much as she didn't want to answer his call, she knew that if she didn't then he'd be mad. "Hi, Paul," Jo says as she answers a phone call. "Good, good. No, I-I am glad you called. Are You picking me up tonight?" She asks. "No, that's fine, I'll ask Steph to give me a ride. Yes, I know you work hard. Paul, I've got to get back. I'm pretty busy today. Okay. Bye. I love you too." She sighs and hangs up her phone call.

"Can you give me a a ride home Steph? Paul can't get here and we get off at the same time," Jo asks as she places her phone into the pocket.

"Sure," Steph says nodding her head. "But didn't he but you a car?"

"He did, but he hardly lets me drive it," Jo sighs.

"You need to leave that husband of yours," Jenna states.

"It's just not that simple. Especially now that I'm pregnant. But I have a plan... sort of," she sighs.

"I know honey," Jenna replies with a slight smile. Jo nods her head in reply and hears her pager go off. She looks down at it and notices that it was from the ER. She was on Callie's service so she heads down to the ER to finds her.

"Dr Torres, I was paged," Jo stages as she sees her at the nurses station in the ER.

"Ah Yes, Dr Stadler. Jordan Rhys, 24. He was ridding his bike this morning when he was clipped by a car going at a slow speed and injured his knee," Callie says as they walk over to bay 5.

"Hi Jordan, I'm Dr Stadler and this is Dr Torres, we're going to be taking care of you today," Jo says. She then looks at his chart and notices that his vitals had been taken by a nurse 5 minutes ago. "Your vitals are stable so I'm going to take you up to get an X-ray on that knee."

"Well done Dr Stadler. Take Jordan up to X-ray and page me when you get the results," Callie replies with a nod of the head. Callie leaves the room and with the assistance of two nurses Jo takes him up to X-ray.

"Dr Stadler..." Jordan begins as Jo assists him to the X-ray table.

"Please, call me Jo," She interjects.

"Jo, you are very hot," he grins.

"Oh, Um..." Jo says taken back. If Paul heard this then Jordan would get his head bitten off and She would too. "I'm married, and pregnant and I'm not exactly thrilled about it. My... my life is very complicated and the last thing I need is for you to be calling me hot," Jo blurts out.

Jordan looks at Jo uncomfortably and gives an anxious look back, "just lay back and don't move. I'm going to get the radiologist to do the scan and I'll be back to collect you," Jo says.

 **Scene break**

"Alright, what's going on?" Callie asks Jo as she walks into the X-ray exam room that Jo had paged her too.

"It's his Patella, it's shattered," Jo says as she points to the scan.

"Okay, so what should we do?" Callie asks Jo.

"He will need surgery to wire is knee back together," Jo says.

"Well done. Book and OR and prep him for surgery," Callie replies with a nod.

 **That night**

 **Jo and Paul's house**

"Please? Please? Please? Please? Come on, honey," Paul begs and he sits on the lounge with Jo.

"I... I feel sick in my stomach," Jo replies.

"You know, I don't remember the last time," Paul points out.

"I feel about as sexy as a tree stump," she replies blankly.

"You haven't been sexier. And am I imagining it, or are your breasts getting bigger? It's Like they grew a size practically overnight," he says with a grin.

Jo shakes her head, "Paul, That's crazy talk."

"You are my wife Josephine and I am your husband. As the man in the relationship what I say goes, and as my wife you are obligated to make me happy by having sex with me where ever and when ever I want. And I want to have sex right now in our bed. So you can either come willingly, or I can force you," he says sternly.

"No," Jo states making a stand.

"Okay, forcefully it is," he replies. He grabs a hold of Jo's wrist and she screams.

 **Thirty minutes later**

Jo lays in her bed, staring lifelessly at the pastel white ceiling. She couldn't believe what had just happened, or more so she didn't know why she was surprised. This was the kind of thing that over the years that Jo had come to expect from Paul. She may have screamed out 'stop' and 'no' a dozen times but yet none of that mattered to Paul. All that mattered to him was to get what he so wrongly thought he was entitled too. Now he laid next to her rapidly kissing her neck.

"Come on, baby, kiss me back," he begs.

Given everything that just happened Jo thought that it was wise to follow his directions. Jo leans forward and gives him a kiss before thumping her head back onto her pillow.

"Are you not enjoying this?" He asks. His voice indicated that he was slightly offended.

"Just tired, that's all," she replies.

"You're always tired lately. You ought to get that looked at because I can't have you getting me sick. I'm a surgeon, I save lives. Go and see the doctor tomorrow and get him to write up a little report of your visit," he orders.

"Sure thing honey," Jo replies faintly


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter four**

 **Two weeks and two days later**

 **18 weeks and 1 day pregnant**

"Dr Stadler, why are you following me? Is everything alright?" Alex asks as he turns around. He had noticed Jo had been following him around the hospital for the past ten minutes.

"Ah Yes, I'm on your service," Jo replies.

"Okay. Um, great. I'm about to do rounds, you can join me," he replies.

"I'm not a monster you know," Jo states out of the blue.

"Um, I'm sorry?" He questions.

"You must think I'm a monster because I'm having a baby and I'm not excited about it. I want you to know that I'm not a horrible person. People can have babies without being excited. That is a thing that happens," Jo explains.

"Jo, I'm not judging you. I know nothing about your life or the events that surround you," he replies simply.

"Thank you," Jo replies with a smile.

"Now, we're rounding on two PICU patients this morning. I want you to familiarise yourself with the charts and meet me back at the nurses station in ten minutes to begin," he replies.

"Yes Dr Karev," Jo replies with a smile. She heads back to the nurses station while Alex continues to walk down the hall until he reaches the coffee cart. He orders a regular coffee and proceeds to wait for it.

"Karev, did Dr Stadler find you?" Arizona asks as she walks over to him.

"Ah, Yes, She did.," Alex confirms. "She Ah, she felt the need to explain her lack of enthusiasm towards having a baby to me," Alex replies.

"And of course I can assume that you made her feel comfortable and not judged?" Arizona questions.

"Yes Robbins, you can assume that," Alex grins.

"Good, good. It's a modern world, not every woman needs to use her female reproductive system to produce offspring. If that's what you want to do then great, but if not, no shame, right?" She asks.

Alex nods his head, "no shame."

"Good," Arizona smiles. "Where is she, I need to talk to her."

Alex grabs his coffee off the coffee cart lady, "She's up at the nurses station, I'll walk with you," Alex replies.

Arizona nods her head and they begin to walk back to the nurses station when they start to hear some people yelling. Upon walking closer they discovered that it was Jo and another man.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me Josephine?" He asks sternly as he slightly raised his voice.

"I.. I... I didn't know how. I'm not exactly thrilled by it," Jo states.

"We are having a baby and you're not trilled?" He questions with a death glaring stare. "There is a life inside of you that I created and you're not happy about that?"

"You are not going to lift a finger. The child rearing responsibilities will be left solely up to me. You want to have lots of children, but I'm going to be doing all of the work. I have no idea how to be a mother. I don't have a single motherly bone in my body. Why would I be thrilled?" She questions.

Jo takes a step back and Paul reaches down and grasps her right wrist.

Alex promptly approaches them, "hey, back off" Alex says sternly as he continues approaching Paul. He glances down at Jo's wrist, which was being held tightly by Paul.

He turns to face Alex, "We're having a private conversation here, do you mind?" Paul spits. He turns back and faces Jo.

"A private conversation that everybody can here. You need to let her go. Now, this is a place of healing... it is a hospital and you need to leave right now," Alex orders.

"You have no right to tell me what to do," Paul yells.

"You need to leave right now or I all calling security to haul your ass out of here," Alex orders. Paul gives him a fierce look and lets go of Jo's wrist. He glares at her with his 'unfinished business' look and walks away.

"Are you Okay? Who was that man?" Alex asks while Arizona walks over to them.

"Why the hell would you do that?" Jo yells at Alex.

"I... I'm sorry," Alex replies taken back, "He was yelling at you and he grabbed your wrist. He looked like he was holding it very tightly," Alex states.

"And now you've gone and made everything thing worse. I... I didn't ask you to butt in now did I?" Jo questions.

"No, but..."

"No butts. I did not ask for your help, period. That man is my husband, and things aren't great between us right now. You don't have to go home and deal will all of that, I do. I have to go home . You butting in has gone and made everything worse. Do you know how hard I'll have to work to make what you did okay?" Jo questions.

"Jo..." he begins before getting cut off.

"No, no you don't, you have no idea how hard it'll be. You have no idea what I'm going to have to do and frankly neither do I. He is unpredictable. Just when I think I've got it worked out, I don't," Jo vents.

"Jo, does he... does he hurt you?" Arizona asks shocked.

"Stay out of this Dr Robbins. This isn't any of your business, it's mine. And now because of this... this thing," Jo says waking her finger around, "it's a huge freaking mess that I have to clean up. I now need to work over time when I get home to make him happy and keep him that way. Now please, leave me alone!" Jo says in a huff before rushing off.

"What should we do?" Alex asks Arizona as they watch Jo walk away.

"Well, we can't make any assumptions, However we can write a report on what we observed here today and anything else that we observe in the future. It must be objective and just state what was seen. No assumptions can be made and you must remain impartial. I'll inform Webber and he'll keep it on her file. Once we have a number of reports stating suspected abuse then further parties will intervene," Arizona explains.

"I can't believe it. Why didn't Jo say anything about it?" Alex replies shocked.

"It's likely she feels trapped. Women in this situation feel an over whelming sense of control from their partner. And he demonstrated that. It's extremely likely that she doesn't know what to do. The defensive behaviour that she showed is common. And let's not mention the fact that she's also pregnant. It means that he now has control in her life for the next 18 years," Arizona says.

"That explains why she is so unenthusiastic about having the baby. I wish there was something more that we could do," Alex sighs.

"Just don't do anything to piss her off and stay out of her business," Arizona warns. Alex nods his head and reaches behind the nurses station and grabs his two charts.

 **Scene break**

"Karev, why are you being so quite? You're usually full of smart arse remarks and Yang has just poured her heart out. Why aren't you ripping into her right now?" Meredith quires as the three of them sit down in the busy lunch room.

"I think I pissed of an intern," Alex states. "I don't know why I said, 'I think' I know I pissed of an intern."

"Why is this a problem Karev? We piss off intern's all the time. What intern did you piss off?" Cristina asks. Alex gives them a look.

"Oh my gosh. You pissed off Jo. The married intern that you have the hots for, right? You pissed her off," Meredith scoffs.

Alex nods his head. "What did you do?" Cristina asks.

"Her and her husband were having a fight and I got involved," he sighs.

"Oh my god Karev, are you stupid? You never get involved in somebody else's crap, ever!" Cristina shuns.

"Well, I didn't know that there was crap there. But he... He sounds like hard work," Alex replies.

"Look Alex, just let it go and stay out of it. It's got nothing to do with you," Meredith warns.

Alex notices Jo walking across the lunch room and stands up. Her begins to walk over to her, "Alex, don't! Alex!" Meredith and Cristina both call out. Alex ignores them and keeps walking towards Jo.

"Jo," Alex calls out.

Jo rolls her eyes and sighs as she looks at him. "What?" She asks annoyed.

"I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for before," Alex says.

"Look, things between my husband and I aren't great right now," Jo replies.

"Jo... is your Ah... is your husband hurting you?" He asks.

"Why the hell would you say that?" Jo asks defensively.

"It's just..." he begins.

"Look, it's not your life, so please, just butt out!" Jo yells before walking off.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter five**

 **Two weeks and three days later- March 16th 2012**

 **20 weeks and 4 days pregnant**

Alex sighs as he walks up the two steps to reach the front porch of his house. Today had been exhausting, both mentally and physically and all he could think about was relaxing on the couch with a beer in his hand.

He walks over to the front door and flicks on the porch light. In the corner of his eye he notices somebody sitting on his porch seat. He walks over and notices it was Jo. Her head was down so he couldn't see her face, but he recognised that hair from anywhere.

"Look, I just want to leave you alone, that you have made so very clear on many occasions. But now you're showing up here at my house... that makes it very hard to stay away," Alex vents.

Jo looks up at him with tears running down her cheek. As she looks at him she exposes a shinny black and blue bruise covering her left eye. She was rocking back and fourth with her arms covering her stomach.

He rushes over to her, "Jo, what happened?" He asks shocked.

"I...I...I'm sorry. I...I...I didn't know where to go," she replies weakly.

"No, I'm glad that you came here," he replies.

"I'm cramping. I'm loosing the baby aren't I? That's What I get for not wanting to have a baby. I was going to be a crap mother, it might as well start from before birth, right?" Jo asks in a panic.

"Cramping can mean a lot of different things..." Alex begins.

"He.. he hit me on the stomach," Jo cries.

"Okay, let's get you to the hospital," Alex says as he extends his hand to Jo.

Once Alex assists Jo into the car he drives the ten minutes to Grey Sloan in silence. They then proceed to walk up to an exam room where Arizona was waiting for them. Given the complex situation in this case, Alex wanted somebody with a lot more experience then he had. Jo lays down on the exam table.

"Jo, this is going to feel a little cold," Arizona says. Jo lifts up her shirt, exposing three large bruises on her abdomen. The black and blue colour indicated that they were very new.

Arizona and Alex share a concerned look as Jo nods her head to single for Arizona to begin the scan.

"Is the baby okay?" Jo asks while taking deep breaths.

"This right here, this is your baby," Arizona says as she points to the screen.

"So the baby is okay?" Jo asks.

"I'd like to keep you in for observation given that you have been cramping. It's just a precaution," Arizona adds as she pauses the scan. She places the Doppler back onto the the machine. She cleans the gel from Jo's stomach and Jo then sits up.

"Jo, what happened?" Alex asks concerned.

"We... we were fighting. I'd made the wrong thing for dinner. He said that I hardly ever cook dinner, usually the cooks do, and the one time I do I screw it up. I also didn't get the house all clean today... I had the whole day off. We started to fight. It got physical," Jo says as she begins to cry. "He pushed me and grabbed me by the hand. He said that I had to make it up to him by having sex with him. I didn't want to... I said 'no' so he forced me on the bed and that's when he hit me," Jo says through her tears.

Arizona and Alex look at Jo sympathetically. They didn't know what to say, no words could make this okay, so they just looked at her with their hearts breaking.

"I...I... I have no place to go... no place to stay. I'd stay with Stephanie, but he'd find me there," Jo panics.

"Well, you'll be safe guarded here. We'll have security standing in front of your door and we will call the police. And when you get discharged tomorrow you can stay with me," Arizona replies.

"You have Sofia. I can't risk him finding me and hurting you or Sofia," Jo says shaking her head.

"Well then you can stay with me. And I won't take no for an answer," Alex insists.

"Okay, Okay," Jo says with a faint simile while nodding her head slightly.

"Jo, the police will want a report listing the extent of your injuries. You'll need an exam, are you comfortable with either one of us giving you the exam?" Alex asks.

"Arizona," Jo says quickly,

Arizona nods her head, "Okay. A second person will need to be in the room, for authenticity and to ensure that this exam is bias free. Would it be okay if Kepner was in here?"

Jo nods her head slowly.

 **Scene break**

"Arizona, hey," April smiles as she sees her friend walking towards her in the hallway.

"I need you to come with me," Arizona orders. April looks at her curiously and Arizona takes her hand and pulls her.

"Oh, okay," April says as she's being pulled away.

"You need to be desecrate. Nobody aside from the very few that already know needs to know that she's here," Arizona explains.

"Who is it? What's going on?" April asks.

"It's Josephine Stadler. She's in the hospital because her husband beat her. We're doing an exam," Arizona says quietly.

"Oh my god," April says shocked.

They rush back to Jo's room, where she was laying silently on the bed and looking up at the ceiling.

"Jo?" Arizona questions gently.

"Have you ever noticed how dirty these ceilings are? They're supposed to be white but they're ore like an off white now. We need to look at getting them cleaned... or repainted. It doesn't provide the best impression to patients," she rambles.

"Jo honey, I know you want to distract yourself and pretend like this didn't happen. But it did happen and you're here. Once we've don't the exam then the police will come in to question you and take your statement," Arizona says gently.

"I'm not pretending that it didn't happen. I'm here, I know it happened. Stuff like this happens and I'm built for it. Distraction helps me cope. It's been my coping mechanism for years. When he'd force me to have sex I'd look at the small hole in the roof and think about how a hook had fallen out and made that hole. When he'd hit me I'd stare into the distance and picture a field of flowers. It's how I get through," Jo explains while being on the cusp of tears.

"It's okay, Jo, it's okay, you can cry," April says gently. She places her right hand on Jo's left shoulder.

Jo nods her head as tears roll down her face. They begin to fall faster and faster and the sounds of her sobs got louder and louder.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter six**

 **The next morning- March 17th 2012**

 **20 weeks and 5 days pregnant**

"Oh my god, Jo, are you okay? Is the baby okay?" Steph asks as she rushes into Jo's hospital room. She had seen that Jo was in the hospital after logging onto the database. She had been looking up her patients file when she came across Jo's.

"I'm...I'm... I'm a bit worse for wear but I'm okay. The baby is strong," Jo replies.

"What happened to you?" Steph asks as she sits down next to Jo. Jo looks down at her lap, "oh my god, it was Paul wasn't?"

"We were fighting. I had made the wrong thing for dinner. Apparently he didn't want A roast beef for dinner... And I didn't get the house clean. He was more mad about that because I'd been home all day. We started to fight and it got physical. He pushed me and grabbed me by the hand. He said that I had to make it up to him by having sex with him. I didn't want to... I said no so he laid me on the bed and that's when he hit me," Jo admits. Her lips were visibly trembling as she tried not to cry.

"Oh honey, why didn't you tell me?" Steph asks heartbroken.

"It... it all happened so fast. I was here and I needed to have exams... talk to the police and I just needed to rest," Jo sobs.

"It's fine, it's fine. The police... have they arrested Paul?" Steph asks. Jo pulls a tissue out from the box next to her bed and blows her nose and cleans her eyes.

"They're ah... they're looking for him," Jo sniffs.

"You can stay with me," Steph suggests.

"Paul would expect that. Alex said that I could stay with him until they found him," Jo replies.

"Where are you going to go after that?" Steph asks curiously.

"Can you go and find out hen I'm being discharged. I can't be in here. I need to be anywhere but in this room," Jo replies ignoring the question. The truth was that she and no idea where she was going to go after that, she didn't know if she would feel comfortable staying in their house. But she didn't know that she could stay with Alex either after Paul was caught.

"Okay, sure," Steph replies while nodding her head. Jo watches Steph walk out of the door. As soon as she walks out of sight Jo unhooks her IV and gets out of bed. She walks over to the hallway and scans it before walking out. She makes her way down to the third floor and over to the intern locker rooms on the west side and changes into her scrubs and lab coat. She ensured that the lab coat strategically hid her IV line and hospital tag.

 **Twenty minutes later**

"Jo, what are you doing?" Alex asks shocked as he sees Jo wondering around the ER

"I'm working," she states.

"You haven't been discharged yet," he replies.

"I know, I know. But I haven't left the hospital so realistically I'm still able to be monitored," she replies casually.

"You are here as a patient, not as an intern," he points out.

"Look, I cannot stay in that room any longer. I feel like a victim in that room," she says and as she does she raises her voice slightly.

"I'm sorry for saying this, but You are a victim Jo. Your husband abused you," Alex replies using the same level of voice that Jo had just used.

Jo takes a look around and notices that Callie, Derek, Meredith, Jackson, April, Webber and Bailey were all staring at them. "I am not a victim. I choose to get married to him, It's my fault and I... I let it happen. And Great, now everybody knows that I'm the pregnant woman with the wife beater husband."

Alex looks at Jo straight in the eye, "If a guy hurts you physically it's got nothing to do with you and who you choose. It's not your fault, it'll never be your fault. You can't blame yourself for somebody else's actions."

"No, you don't get it. He was the first person in the world who loved me. He used to make me dinner. He would spoil me with flowers and spa days. We'd go on dates to fancy restaurants and we'd laugh at each other's jokes and smile. We used to be happy and maybe, just maybe I was holding onto the hope that things would go back to that someday. So, as much as I hated him, I decided to ignore every opportunity I had to leave him because I wanted to believe that there was still some good left in him..." She snaps.

"Jo..." Alex begins.

"And I know that it's screwed up, but that's the way it was. And it wasn't until I thought that I was pregnant that I realised that I didn't want to stay with him. I am pregnant with a baby I don't want, I am all hormonal. I'm sorry if I can't help blame myself for the situation I'm in," She vents before walking away.

Meredith rushes over to Alex, "Okay, Alex, I know that you want to help, but you need to keep out of it," she warns.

"I can't stay out of it Mer, I'm right in the middle of it," he says frustratedly.

"From what I just overheard, she's in a delicate situation right now. Just give her a bit of space. She needs to process things right now," Meredith warns.

"Oh my god, she's married to an abusive husband?" Callie asks shocked as she stands with the rest of the group in the ER.

"It's sad, so sad," April confirms. "When I saw her last night I just... I just wanted to cry for her."

"When did you see her last night Kepner?" Derek asks.

"I've um, I've probably said too much," April replies quickly before walking away.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter seven**

**The next morning- March 18th**

**20 weeks and 6 days pregnant**

It's 5am and Jo had the next few days off work, so why the hell was she awake right now? As she sat in the living room of Alex's house all she could think about why how much she wanted to sleep, but just couldn't. Her mind kept flashing back to that moment.

"Jo, why are you awake?" Alex asks as he walks down the stairs. He had been coming down to grab a glass of water and had noticed the living room light was on.

"I...I... I can't sleep. He is out there and I just can't sleep," Jo says while rocking back and forth on the lounge.

Alex sighs and walks over to her. He really didn't know what to say. Was there even anything that anybody could say to somebody in her situation? He was doubtful. As he walks near he notices that her eyes were red and welted, that meant that she had been crying. "I'm not going tell tell you that everything is going to be okay, because I don't know that. I have no idea what will happen."

Jo looks at him and raises her eyebrows. "But I do know that you have a lot of people on your side who are doing everything in their power to help you. You've just got to have faith," he says.

"You know, for somebody who has the tendency to say the wrong things, you sure just said everything right," she replies.

He gives a chuckle, "Well, I try."

"When they charge him they'll be a trial. He won't just roll over and plead guilty. I don't know if I can do that. If I can stand up in court and testify about what he did to me. I'll be reliving all of the trauma, I won't be able to keep it together," she says. She looks at him and her eyes were beginning to well up.

"Not keeping it together while being on the stand wouldn't be the worst thing in the world you know. It shows how affected you were," Alex explains.

Jo nods her head, "I'm sorry," she cries.

"For what?" Alex asks.

"For dumping all of my crap on you. You didn't sign up for that when you were assigned to be my OB. You're not even a real OB," she cries.

"Hey, hey," Alex says as he places his fingers under her chin and gently lifts her head up so his eye could make eye contact with hers, "You are not dumping your crap on me. You are my co-worker and I'd like to say my friend. And at Grey Sloan we fight for our own. You have this whole hospital behind you," he replies honestly.

"Thank you. I just won't sleep properly knowing that he is out there. It'll be better once I know he's behind bars. Now you go and sleep, you have work," she orders.

"No, no I don't. I've taken the day off. I can't let you be here alone," he replies.

"Thank you," Jo replies crying. She rests her head in Alex's shoulder and the tears flow freely from her eyes.

 **Eight hours later**

Jo sits at the breakfast bar in the kitchen next to Alex when she hears her phone ring, she picks it up from the counter and notices the caller I.D was from the police station. She looks at Alex with hope filled in her eyes and promptly answers the phone call.

"Hello, Dr Josephine Stadler speaking," she says.

"Josephine, it's detective Liam Woods from South Seattle police department calling," Liam replies.

"Ah Yes, Detective Woods, did you catch him? Did you catch my husband?" Jo asks hopeful.

"Yes Dr Stadler, we did. We've questioned him and are processing him now," Liam says.

"Oh thank God. Thank you, thank you, thank you," Jo says happily.

"Dr Stadler?" Liam questions.

"Yes," Jo replies.

"I thought you should know that Paul waived his right to representation and with the evidence against him things doesn't look good for him. While in questioning he confessed to spousal Abuse. The State DA will offer Paul a deal and with his confession it will be in his best interest for him to take it. We should be lucky enough to avoid a trial," Liam explains.

"Thank you so much, that's wonderful. When will we know more?" Jo asks eagerly.

"The DA will visit him tomorrow in state lockup," Liam replies.

"Okay, thank you very much. Okay, bye," Jo replies happily. She hangs up her phone and places it onto the kitchen counter. She looks over at Alex, who was eagerly waiting for her to talk.

"The police found him. I don't know what kind of interrogation techniques they used, but He... he confessed to spousal abuse. The DA is going to visit him in state lock up tomorrow. If we're lucky we will avoid trial," Jo says happily.

"Oh my gosh, that's amazing! Congratulations!" Alex says happily.

"I'm free. I'm finally going to be free. I can file for divorce and I'll have my life back. It'll be mine," Jo says with a huge smile on her face.

 **The next day**

Jo holds her mobile phone up to her left ear lifelessly as she sat in the intern locker room. She started into the distant future and as she did she tried to be hopeful, but it was hard given the news that she had just heard. She wondered if she'd heard Detective Liam Woods right. She couldn't of, right?

"I'm so... sorry, can you please repeat that?" Jo asks. Her voice was visibly shaking.

"Paul has recanted his confession and has said that he made the confession under duress. He's acquired legal representation," Liam says slowly.

Jo sighs and looks down at the floor frustratedly and she begins to rapidly tap her legs, "What does this mean?"

"There will be a trial. Unfortunately the judicial system is backed up so it's going to be a number of months, possibly years before it goes before the court," Liam replies.

"And what happens until then?" She asks.

"There will be a bail hearing this afternoon. Our ADA is excellent and she's going to apply that he be remanded into custody without bail," Liam explains.

"Great, this is just great. You know, I really need this at the moment. It's not like I'm pregnant and filled with raging hormones right now? Oh, no, I can totally handle this!" Jo says sarcastically.

"Josephine, I know that this is hard news to hear. But we are doing everything we can," Liam says calmly.

"Wh... what happens if he gets Bail, and then he makes bail? He'll be out there, and what happened then? He'll be free to hurt me," Jo says.

"If he makes Bail then you will have protection. Josephine, we are doing everything we can, Okay?" Liam asks sternly.

Jo slowly nods her head, "Okay," she replies. She hangs up her phone and places it down on the wooden bench. She looks into the distance, the world seemed like a dark, dark place, it wasn't fair, she thought she'd been through the worst of it. And yet here she was, about to face the darkest days of her life.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter eight**

**10 weeks later- May 29th 2012**

 **30 weeks and one day pregnant**

Jo sits in the busy waiting room of the paediatric and Maternity ward. She takes a deep gulp as she watches three different families with their children.

In Family one there was a mother and a father. They had two children, a boy and a girl. The girl looked to be two and the boy appeared to be about five years old. They looked happy, the kids were smiling and laughing. They had a family, the children had a mother and a father. That was something her baby wouldn't have. Her baby would be stuck with just a mother.

Family two there was a mother and a newborn baby. The baby had been crying but within a moment of the mother holding the baby she had calmed down. She looked like a natural... the way she looked down at the baby with such love was something of a foreign concept to Jo. She didn't have a motherly bone in her body.

Family three consisted of three boys who looked to be 7, 5 And 3. They were making a mess of the hospital room and their mother and father were struggling to control them. The parents were yelling and the children weren't listening to them. What if one of those kids tuned out to be Jo's kid. What would she do then? Her child would start spiralling down a path of juvenile delinquency. I mean, She didn't know how to parent... how to discipline a child. She was counting whole heartedly on this child to parent it's self.

What in God's name was she walking into? At least Paul's Bail was denied, that was something positive in her life.

Jo watches a nurse as she walks out of exam room 4. She had light brown hair that was the length of her shoulders and wore black glasses, "Josephine Stadler," she announces.

Jo sighs and stands up. She walks slowly towards the room. The nurse hands her a hospital gown and Jo waits on the exam room table for Dr Karev and Dr Robbins.

A moment later Arizona walks into the room and shuts the door behind her.

"Where's Dr Karev, or is it just you today Dr Robbins?" Jo asks curiously.

"Karev was pulled into emergency surgery. It's just me," Arizona smiles. Jo nods her head and lays down on the exam table. Arizona places some gel onto Jo's stomach and begins the scan, "how are you feeling Jo?" Arizona asks curiously.

"I have no idea where to live. I can't go back to Paul and I's house, too many awful memories have happened there. I don't think I could stomach it. I can't sell it because both of our names and signatures are on the contract. I don't have his permission and I won't ever get it. I'm broke, So that means I can't afford to rent anywhere. I don't want to move in with Steph or Jenna because then it feels like I'm a burden. But I can't raise a baby with no place to live can I? I guess the Bright side is that I lived in my car during high school, so I know how to do it, but I don't know how to do it with a baby. And wow, I never thought I'd be saying that, or even be seriously considering living in my car again," Jo vents. Arizona could sense that Jo was beginning to become emotional.

"The hospital has a housing allowance budget. You can apply for it, you've got a good shot. I don't know if you'd get anything before the baby comes, but you don't know until you try," Arizona suggests. She pauses the scan and places the Doppler back into the ultrasound machine.

"I don't know what the hell it is I'm doing. I can't raise this kid. It'll grow up dark and twisty and permanently damaged," Jo cries.

"Jo, look at me," Arizona orders. Jo looks up at Arizona, "I'm a paediatric surgeon and I never wanted kids. Callie couldn't understand why. I was thrown into the situation of Callie getting pregnant while we were broken up. It wasn't something that I wanted, but I loved her so I was going to help her raise this baby. I was unsure and scared at first, but then I saw this baby and she was sick, very, very sick, and while I didn't know that everything was going to be okay, I knew that I could get through it with my friends and family by my side, and you can too."

"I don't have any family. I don't know that I can," Jo cries.

Arizona places her right hand on Jo's right shoulder, "Family isn't defined by blood. Family are those who stick around you in times of trouble. Everybody in this hospital is your family," Arizona replies.

"I'm going to screw up this baby just like I screw up everything else in my life," Jo sighs.

"Then you'll do what everybody else does and take it one day at a time," Arizona says wisely.

"Thank you," Jo smiles.

"Your baby girl is healthy and has a strong heartbeat," Arizona smiles. Jo smiles with a sigh of relief.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter nine**

**8 weeks later- July 25th 2012**

**38 weeks and 1 day pregnant**

It was late when Jo lays awake in the queen bed of the spare bedroom of Alex's house. She knew that It wasn't the best idea for her to stay at Alex's house, but the option had appealed to her much more then living in her car once more. She had applied for and received the hospital housing grant and had even found a few places that she liked but still had to save enough money for the rental bond, so for the meantime it was Alex's house or nothing.

She looks over at the baby furniture piled up in her room. The crib and dresser wasn't built yet, the bouncer wasn't out of the box and nothing had been organised. Nesting was something Jo was told would happen when she reached the later stages in her pregnancy.

She was hooping that it would kick in any day now so that she could begin to prepare for the baby. There was only so many more days Jo could go before she would have to start to force herself to start preparing, and that wasn't something she was willing to do.

Jo was tossing and turning, attempting to find a comfortable position to spend the night. It was a feet that seemed almost impossible with her baby bump constantly in the way. All she wanted was a decent night rest so she could muster up the energy to preform the basic daily tasks that were pertinent to her survival.

Upon feeling a trickle running down her legs and a sharp pain in her abdomen, Jo flings up in the bed. She turns on the light and lifts up the sheets. She notices a wet patch on the bed's fitted sheets.

"Oh god," she mutters to herself. She begins to panic. She wasn't ready to have a baby and She wasn't even at her due date yet. That was still two weeks away.

"Alex," Jo calls out. With no response she waits a few more moments before calling him once again, "Alex... Alex..." She calls out. "Alexander Karev!" She shouts. The panic was growing in her voice.

Alex hears Jo's cries and rushes into her room, "what's going on? Are you okay?" He asks as he stands in the doorway of the guest room.

Jo shakes her head, "My... My... I think my Water broke," she says as she looks down at the wet patch on the bed.

"Okay Jo, this is good. You're going to meet your little girl. We need to get you to the hospital," he says.

"It's not possible right? I'm only 38 weeks. It's too soon, the baby isn't ready and I am not ready," Jo says shaking her head.

"38 weeks is considered full term, it's perfectly safe for you to deliver now. And I know that you might not be ready to meet your baby, but your baby is ready to meet you Have you had any pain?" He asks as he walks over to her.

Jo nods her head, "Yes, when I felt a trickle coming down my legs."

"Let's get you to the hospital," he says. He takes Jo's hand and guides her out of the bed and to the front door. He grabs their wallets and car keys from the hallway table and helps Jo to the car.

Jo crouches over, "Ow," she winces in pain as she grips her stomach. Alex rubs her back and the contraction passes. Once it passes he helps her into the car and they head of to the hospital luckily it was only a 10 minute drive, but it was a 10 minute drive that was sure to feel like hours.

10 minutes and 5 more contractions later they reach the hospital. Alex rushes over to the passenger door and opens it for Jo. Arizona rushes over with the wheelchair. Alex had paged Arizona on the way to the hospital to ensure that everybody was prepared for Jo's arrival.

"Get me in the wheelchair!" Jo orders while clenching her jaw. She practices breathing deeply. Arizona nods her head and she and Alex assist Jo into the wheelchair.

"Where is Steph? Where is Jenna?" Jo asks sternly.

"They are on their way to the hospital," Arizona replies.

 **Scene break**

Ten minutes later Jo was hooked up to monitors and was up in the OB ward. Sitting by her side was Alex while Arizona was taking her blood pressure. Sitting on the lounge on the right side of the room was Steph and Jenna, who were instructed by Arizona to sit and stay out of the way.

"You're not the father, you don't have to be here," Jo says as she looks at him.

"I want to be here," Alex replies. He grabs her hand and gives Jo a reassuring smile.

Jenna and Steph look at each other, "oh, please," Jenna laughs.

"Karev, can I talk to you outside?" Arizona asks upon noticing the exchange.

Alex nods his head, "Sure."

The pair walk outside Jo room. "You're getting attached Karev," Arizona states blankly.

"I am not," Alex replies quickly. He shakes his head.

Arizona sighs, "You are getting attached to her Karev, and I'm telling you now, it's not a good idea. She's about to have a baby. Her whole life is going to change, and the last thing she needs to complicate things is somebody having feelings for her. She is anxious enough as it is about having a baby," Arizona warns sternly.

"I know how she feels about having a baby. I'm not going to go and screw with her head," Alex replies annoyed. Over their conversation they could hear Jo's screams.

"You are either in there as her friend, or as her doctor Karev, you can't be both," Arizona says sternly before she walks back into her room. She is followed by Alex and a nurse who was going to assist Arizona.

Steph and Jenna were now on either side of Jo's bed and were each holding one of her hands.

"You're doing great. Remember to breathe," Alex says supportively.

"Do you think I'm going to forget to breathe!" She snaps back.

"You're doing great. Deep and shallow breaths," Arizona coaches. Nurse Jane picks up Jo's chart and begins to note down her vitals.

"Your voice sounds like a quacking mouse! And mouses don't quack!" She snaps at her. Jo breaths deeply as her contraction passes. She looks up at everybody in the room. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. That was really mean," she says helplessly.

"It's okay. I've heard it all before," Arizona replies.

"I'm not ready. And I know that I haven't been prepared this entire pregnancy, but I'm really, really, really not prepared to have this baby right now. Nothing is set up. The crib is still in the box. I don't what what the hell it is that I'm doing and this baby isn't fully cooked yet," Jo pleads.

"I know that this all seems to much right now..." Arizona begins before being cut off by Jo's scream as she has a contraction.

"I want drugs. And I don't mean the pussy drugs. I mean the good drugs. I need all of the good drugs that you can give me!" Jo screams as she breaths through the contraction.

Arizona hears some beeping coming from the baby's monitor and notice's that the baby girl's stats were dropping.

"Okay Jo, I don't want you to freak out, but it may be too late for you to get pain medication, Your contractions are two minutes apart, and the baby's stats are low. I'm going to check your cervix," Arizona says calmly.

Jo nods her head quickly and Arizona begins to check Jo. As she does she discovers that the baby's cord was wrapped around her neck.

"Jane, I need you to call up to an OR and have them prep for an Emergency C section," Arizona says quietly. Jane nods her head and heads over to the hospital phone that was on the wall.

"An OR, what is going on?" Jo asks panicking. Arizona glances at Jo's monitor and see's that Jo's BP was getting higher.

"Jo, take some deep breaths," Alex and Arizona coach.

"What's going on?" Steph asks.

"Jo, your daughters cord is wrapped around her neck and she's struggling to get enough oxygen. We need to do a C section," Arizona explains.

Once Jo was prepped, with the aide of two nurses and a resident Arizona wheel's Jo down to the OR. Within moments Jo had been put to sleep and had delivered a healthy baby girl and her screams filled the room.

 **Baby Stadler**

 **5 pounds**

 **28th of July 2012, 3:28am**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter ten**

 **July 25th 2012**

 **12 hours old**

Her daughters loud cries were very hard for Jo to distinguish. The little girl had only been alive for 12 hours, and yet she had some how managed to develop four different cries, all of which meant completely different things.

She had Loud and distressed cries. She had Loud and whining cries. There was a mixture of both, and finally a soft whimpering cry, and Jo had no idea what each cry meant.

How on earth did a newborn develop so many cries in such a short period of time? It didn't seem possible.

The apparent lack of motherly skills and nurturing did nothing to help Jo attempt to figure out what each cry meant and she usually resorted to a checklist; change nappy, hold baby, feed baby, put baby to bed. If nothing from her list did the trick then panic would soon ensue.

Jo hoped that her motherly skills would soon kick in, as she had been told a thousand times, but 12 hours later and there was nothing. Not even a motherly thought had crossed her mind. She hadn't even thought of a name for her daughter. And although she knew that she had to give her daughter a name, the thought of actually giving her a name hadn't even crossed her mind yet. Why kind of a mother thought like that? Not a good one, that was sure.

She was going to be a crappy mother, she was sure of it. After all, she never had a mother to guide her and to nurture her? She had no kind of example to follow. How the hell was she going to make it as a mother for the next 18 years? She was flying blind, she just hoped she didn't do anything to scar her daughter for life.

Jo hears her daughter begin to make a loud and distressed cry. "Oh no," Jo sighs. It had been a mere ten minutes since she had finally gotten the newborn settled.

Her daughter was in a crib right next to the side of the bed, so Jo carefully leaned over and grabbed her daughter. She was extra careful so she didn't aggravate her wind site. "Stop crying, stop crying, please stop crying," she begged while holding her. "What do you need? Are you tired?" Jo asks. "I just had you asleep and you woke up, so if you're tired that one is on you." She pauses for a moment before continuing, "are you hungry?" She asks. She pulls down half of her singlet and attempts to get the crying infant to latch. A few moments later she pulls back up her top. "Do you need to be changed?" Jo asks. She holds up Her bottom to her nose and smells it. "No. Please just tell me. I can't read your mind so just tell me what you want," Jo begs stressfully through the cries.

"Try rocking her gently," Alex pipes up.

Jo looks over at him startled, "how long have you been standing there for?"

"Just hold your daughter and rock her, she'll calm down," Alex instructs.

"I..I... I'm so sore Alex. I've just had major surgery and I can barely move let alone rock her. Can you do it?" Jo begs.

Alex sighs and walks over to Jo. He gently grabs the newborn from Jo's arms and begins to rock her. As he does she begins to calm down.

"You're so good with her, much better then I am and I'm her mother," Jo sighs.

Alex looks down at her daughter and then looks up at Jo, "Look, I know you are nervous and scared. You now have another human life you're now responsible for, it's allowed," Alex replies.

"Alex, I'm more then freaking out here. I don't even know how to describe how I'm feeling. I've had no parental figures my entire life. I rushed into a relationship with a man who thought was a good man because he gave me a home. Despite his abuse, despite all of the opportunities I had to leave him, I chose not to. It took me being pregnant to realise that I had to get out, and even then I was in denial. What kind of a role model does that make me, huh?" She asks desperately.

"The very fact that you left him makes you a fantastic role model. You left him for your child and that makes you freaking strong," Alex says honestly. He walks over to the other side of Jo's bed and places the now sleeping newborn into her crib. Jo gives him a small smile.

"Who's surname can she have? Can she use my maiden name? I didn't research this. I didn't even think of a single name to give her," Jo admits.

"The law states that a child much have the surname of one or both of its parents. Seeing as you are keeping the baby then she must have your surname..." Alex begins.

Jo sighs, "And because I'm still married to Paul my surname is Stadler. As if It's not bad enough that I'm still married to him, now this baby has to be connected to him too."

"I'm sorry," Alex replies genuinely.

"What should I name her? I don't know anything about naming a child," Jo musses.

"I could get you a book," Alex suggests.

"A book, really Karev. That's the best you can suggest?" Jo laughs.

"I'm really sorry, but yes," he laughs. "I'm sorry to break it to you, but haven't named a child before either."

"But you work in Paeds. You see people name their babies all the time," Jo points out to him.

"And I don't help them do it," he laughs.

"Oh, yeah, right," she laughs back. "Ow," she whines. The laughing caused her to aggravate her wound site. She stops laughing and looks at him with an intriguing smile.

"What?" He asks.

"It's just, today, for the first time since... well, I can't even remember when... today is the first time in a very long time that I laughed... that I was happy. Thank you for that," Jo says honestly.

"You're welcome," he smiles.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter eleven**

**One week later- 1st August 2012**

**One week old**

Jo looks around the chaotic ER in the search for somebody the could help her. In front of her was a pram that contained her newborn daughter. She had been screaming for the past half an hour and after several failed attempts at soothing her, Jo decided to resort to outsider help.

She looks to her right and notices Alex was talking to a blonde haired woman. Jo slowly walks over to him, careful as to not agitate her incision site.

"Alex?" Jo questions. Alex and the blonde hairs woman look over at Jo and Alex smiles.

"Izzie, this is Josephine Stadler. Jo, this is Izzie Stevens, my ex-wife," Alex announces.

"Alex, she's crying and she won't stop. I've gone through the checklist and nothing. She's been fed, she's slept, she's been changed and I gave her a bath so she's she's clean, which for the record, made her cry even more. I have no idea what to do," Jo pleads.

"Hold her," Alex instructs.

"I've tried that too. She doesn't want to be held," Jo replies as Alex picks her up. Alex begins to smooth the infant and she stops crying.

"Wh... how... how did you do that?" Jo questions shocked.

"Jo, you need to relax. She is your daughter not some form of vicious animal. She won't bite you," Alex replies.

"A baby looks good on you Karev, congratulations, you both must be very happy," Izzie says genuinely.

"Oh, the baby's not mine. Jo isn't my wife... she's not even my girlfriend, we're just friends," Alex replies.

"Oh I'm sorry, I..I just assumed and I have no idea why," Izzie replies flustered.

"Her father is my husband... soon to be my jerk face, asshole, pathetic excuse for a human ex- husband," Jo says casually.

"Woah, wow," Izzie replies shocked.

"And yet it's all true," Jo replies Casually.

"I'm going to hand her back to you now," Alex says to Jo.

"Oh no, no, please don't hand her back to me. She hates me," Jo insists while quickly shaking her head.

"She doesn't hate you Jo," Alex replies. He hands Jo her daughter and the instant Jo's arms touch her she begins to cry.

"See, she hates me," Jo says seriously.

"Relax. Take a deep breath. She can feel your anxiety, that's what is setting her off," Alex advises.

Jo nods her head and takes a deep breath and begins to calm down and as she does her daughter begins to stop crying.

"See," Alex replies.

"We're getting discharged in an hour. I'm supposed to be taking her home today. I haven't even named her, is that even allowed? Can I take a nameless baby home?" Jo questions seriously.

"You have 60 days to register the birth of a baby. But you need to have a name for her when you register. At the moment she's just on the hospital records and that's okay," Alex explains.

Jo nods her head and carefully places her daughter back into the pram, "I'll come back in half an hour when she hates me again," Jo states before leaving.

"Wow, Okay, I'm guessing motherly instincts are not her thing," Izzie laughs.

"Its complicated. Her husband would abuse her so she didn't exactly want to be pregnant, or have a baby. But she couldn't get rid of the baby either. She also grew up in foster care, so with no parental guidance growing up she is way out of her depth," Alex explains.

"Well, lucky she has you," Izzie replies suggestively.

"Yeah, lucky," Alex replies. "How have you been Iz? It's been a long time," he asks.

"Good, I'm married, I still use Stevens at the hospital but I use Hancock everywhere else. My husband James and I have three children. I can't get pregnant because, well, you know, so we adopted. Two girls, Ava and Hailey and a boy, Luke," Izzie smiles. She takes out her phone and pulls up a photo and shows it to him.

He gives a grin and laughs, "they're cute."

"They are," Izzie replies back with a smile. "What about you? How have you been? Married? Babies?" She asks with a grin.

"I've Ah, I've had a few relationships but nothing that was serious," he says as his mind drifts away to thinking about Jo.

"Oh my gosh, you like Dr Stadler don't you? You like Josephine," she says with a massive smile.

"She just had a baby. She's getting out of an abusive marriage. She's not ready to start anything," Alex replies. "But I can't help it Iz. When I'm around her I just... I can't explain it but she's the one for me, I just know it," he explains and his face lights up.

"It sounds like she's worth waiting for," Izzie smiles. "And I'll know if you don't wait Karev. Dr Webber hired me as the new Head of Obstetrics."

"Welcome back," he says with a smile.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter twelve**

**One week later- August 8th**

 **2 weeks old**

Jo thought she knew what exhausted was. She thought all of the 24 hour shifts and the on call nights made her prepared what was was going to hit her, but boy oh boy, was she wrong.

As she walked down the stairs of Alex's house to open the front door she could barley keep her eyes open. She felt like a walking zombie. Why wouldn't her daughter stop crying? If Jo had to bet she'd say her daughter had been screaming for at least 3/4 of the time she had been home, and was in fact crying right now. Jo had tired everything on her checklist, even holding her and nothing seemed to calm the newborn down, so as a result Jo hadn't slept. And that was physically and mentally exhausting. This is what exhausted was.

She hears the doorbell ring once more, "I'm coming!" Jo calls out annoyed. She stands in front of the door and takes a deep breath before opening the door.

"Oh my god Jo, you look like shit," Steph exclaims as she looks at Jo.

"Hi," Jo replies with a deathly stare.

"Can I come in?" Steph asks hopeful.

"The house is a mess, but okay," Jo replies. She opens the door a little further so that Steph can walk in. As she walks in she looks she looks the living room and sees piles of cloths everywhere, she walks past the living room and down to the kitchen and dining area and sees piles of unwashed dishes and bags of rubbish that hadn't been taken out.

"Ah, you weren't kidding, Jo, this house is a mess," Steph replies shocked. She expected the house to be a little messy, but this was just crazy. "Jo, you need to do some cleaning."

"I can't. I have a baby screaming in my ear. She's stoped for maybe 12 hours out of the entire week I've been home. I am mentally and physically exhausted. I don't have any energy to clean, I've used all my energy trying to get my kid to like me," Jo cries. "And.. and Alex is pretty much staying at the hospital, he's a surgeon, he needs to sleep. I understand. But I'm trying to do everything on my own and it's just not possible when I have a kid that doesn't like me."

Steph places her hand onto Jo's left shoulder, "Okay. Okay," she sighs, "Is that your daughter crying?" Steph questions.

"She won't stop. I've tried everything and nothing worked. So now I thought that my presence might be the problem so I decided I'd leave her alone," Jo sighs sadly.

"I'm going to go and get her, Okay?" Steph asks. Jo nods her head in acknowledgement and Steph walks upstairs to get the baby. Within a few moments of rocking the newborn she settled down and Steph walks down with her. When she walks back into the kitchen she notices that Jo was sitting at the dinning table with her head cradled in her hands.

"Are you Okay?" Steph asks concerned.

"I have a baby that hates me. Do I honestly look like I'm okay? I don't know how the hell I'm going to do it. I don't think I can," Jo admits through cries.

"When do you have her first checkup?" Steph asks curiously.

"I...I...I don't even know. It's on the calendar I think," Jo says as she points to the fridge.

Steph walks over to the calendar and notices that the appointment was exactly one week away. "Jo, you do know that if you have any concerns over the baby's health your your recovery, physically and mentally, you can always come into the hospital sooner. You don't have to wait until your appointment, Somebody to talk to might help," Steph stresses.

"What are you trying to say?" Jo asks.

"I am saying that you're not alone," Steph replies while rocking the baby.

"Thank you," Jo replies genuinely.

"Have you thought of a name for this pretty lady yet?" Steph asks curiously.

"No," Jo sighs. "But I've got 46 more days to name her. I kind of think that she needs to like and and I need to get to know her before I give her a name she'll be stuck with for the rest of her life. It's the biggest decision I'll be making for her. I wanna get it right and in order to get it right I need to like her and I don't like her yet," Jo replies blankly.

"You don't like her yet?" Steph questions stunned.

"No, I don't like her yet," she says casually, "and she doesn't like me either so the feeling is mutual."

"Jo, you've gotta try," Steph says gently.

"I am trying. I try every single day. I fed her, I bathe her, I put her to sleep, but she just screams at me every chance she gets. It's not my fault," Jo replies defensively.

Steph nods her head slowly. She couldn't help but think that there was something else going on. She has her suspicions, but the main thing that popped into her mind was post natal depression.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter thirteen**

 **The same day- August 8th 2012**

**At the hospital**

Steph is deep in thought as she walks through the lunch room. "Dr Edwards, are you okay?" Meredith asks as she notices Steph walking around. Next to Meredith was Izzie,

"I...I..I'm worried about Jo," Steph states.

"You're Dr Stadler's friend, right?" Izzie asks.

"Yes," Steph confirms before she looks back at Meredith. A second later she turns back to Izzie, after realising that she hadn't met her yet. "And who are you?"

"Oh, I'm Dr Isobel Stevens. I'm the new head of OB. I did some of my residency here," Izzie states.

"Some?" Steph quires nervously. "Why only some? What did you do?"

"What ever you do, don't tell her about the cutting the LVAD incident," Meredith says with a grin.

"Mer, she's right here," Izzie points out.

"I know that," Meredith replies.

"LVAD… What was the thing with the LVAD?" Steph asks concerned.

"I was an Intern. My Fiancé, Denny needed a heart transplant so I cut his LVAD wire to move him up the list," Izzie explains.

"And what happened to him?" StePh asks curiously.

"He died of a heart attack post surgery. Left me 8 million dollars… he's the reason why we have the Denny Duquette memorial clinic," Izzie sys.

"Oh, right. But that had nothing to do with you leaving?" Steph asks confused.

"There was a hospital merger. I had Cancer and I'd just come back to work after been given the Okay. There were budget cuts and I was cut," Izzie replies.

"You were worried about Jo?" Meredith prompts.

"I think she's got Post natal depression. She's not enjoying her daughter. And I know that she didn't want to be pregnant in the first place, and then there's the whole situation with her husband, but there's just something else that's off," Steph explains.

"She'll have a newborn checkup next week. They'll ask her questions regarding her adjustment to motherhood then," Meredith reassures Steph.

Steph nods her head before walking away.

"What is the deal with Alex and Dr Stadler. Does he like her?" Izzie asks curiously.

"He does," Meredith confirms.

"I hope that she will make him happy…. That he's finally found the one," Izzie says with a genuine smile.

"Me too," Meredith smiles.

 **One week later- August 15th 2012**

 **3 weeks old**

"Well Jo, your daughter has passed all her tests with flying colours," Arizona smiles as she lays the infant onto the exam table after checking her weight. Arizona held her hands on the baby's tiny stomach to ensure that she wouldn't roll of the table and would remain safe.

"Really, are you sure?" Jo as surprised. She was sitting in a blue chair next Arizona, and next to the exam table.

"I'm sure, is there something you were concerned about?" Arizona so Jo curiously.

"It's just that she hardly stops crying. She spends maybe two hours of the night and day not crying and just cries for the other 22," Jo states blankly.

Arizona looks down at the baby, who was currently happy, before looking back up at Jo, "is there a particular time of the day, or an activity that makes her cry more?"

"Ah, Yes. When ever Touch her or go near her... especially when I touch her," Jo replies.

"Okay. And how are you feeling Jo?" Arizona questions.

"How do you mean, how am I feeling?" Jo asks confused.

"How are you adjusting to motherhood. Is it what you expected? Are you finding things challenging?" Arizona asks.

"I didn't expect anything going into this. I know better then to expect something and get my hopes up for something that might not happen. I have no energy to do anything and when I do fell just a little bit of energy I don't want to do anything. I know that I should be enjoying my baby, but I'm not. I have no idea what I'm doing, I feel like anything I do will hurt her and scar her for life. I'm a single mother. Her father is a monster and I don't know what I'm doing. How the hell am I good enough for her?" Jo vents.

Arizona places her hand on Jo' left shoulder, "I know that this is hard. Your hormone's are changing all of the time. What you are feeling isn't your fault. You gave birth to another human life, and while it is miraculous, it can also be hard, painful and tough, especially in the weeks following the birth. With the hormone changes occurring there can also come challenges, one of which is Post Natal depression," Arizona says supportively and cautiously. Arizona knew that this was a tough and sensitive subject for new mothers, and she didn't want to rub Jo the wrong way.

"Are you saying that I have that?" Jo asks curiously.

"When we started this checkup we took some blood. It is routine that we screen for certain things following birth. Your blood results along with how you've explained to me you're feeling, indicate that you have Post natal depression. I'm going to prescribe Lofepramine, which is an anti depressant," Arizona explains, "it can take 2-4 weeks before you start to notice a difference and I want you to take one tablet each day in the morning, usually between 8 and 11. I also want you to see a therapist. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that you've been through a lot... with your husband and the pregnancy."

Jo gives a faint smile, "Okay." She was willing to give anything a go if it meant she might start to feel better.

The tiny infant begins to fuss and Arizona picks her up from the table and cradles her in her arms. "Now, Have thought of a name for this gorgeous girl?"

Jo shakes her head slowly, "I..I... I don't even like her yet. How can I give her a name that she'll be stuck with for the rest of her life when I don't even like her yet?"

Arizona gives Jo a small smile, "how about I come and stay with you a while. I can help you out, help you get to know her a bit better. It's a lot easier to take care of a baby and get to know her when you're not stressed. I can teach you to look after her."

Jo thinks for a moment. Having somebody to help her would actually be a help. And she needed help. "I would like that very much."

"Okay good, let's start now. I want you to grab your daughter from me," Arizona requests.

"What?" Jo asks shocked. "She'll only start to cry," she shakes her head.

"And I'll teach you how to calm her down Stadler. It'll be okay. Take your daughter," Arizona prompts with a smile.

Jo anxiously nods her head and slides her arms under her daughter and the instant Jo does she begins to cry.

"It's okay Jo," Arizona says as she assists Jo to maintain the proper grip of her daughter. Once she does she cradled the infant in her arms.

"Now Jo, I can see that you're anxious. Babies can pick up on that, so I want you to take some deep breaths," Arizona instructs.

As Jo begins to focus on her breathing the infant begins to calm down and settles within Jo's arms. "She's not crying. She's not crying," Jo says happily. She looks down at her daughter and smiles. "Hey baby girl."

"You're doing well," Arizona smiles.

"This is the first time I've looked at her and smiled," Jo says unbelievably.

"Then we're making progress," she replies happily.

"How are you always so bubbly?" Jo questions, "it's kind of makes you seem like a psychopath."

Arizona laughs at the new mothers response. It was very clear to Arizona that she and Jo did not see the world through the same rose coloured glasses, but Arizona hoped that Jo's new treatment plan would help her become a happier person. "You're at Karev's aren't you?" She asks.

"Yes," Jo confirms, "but he's not there. He's been staying at the hospital. The baby isn't sleeping and in our profession we need to sleep. He was able to settle her, but he didn't want to do that because in his words he'd be a 'bad mother enabler', and he wasn't gonna do that. I'm pretty sure he's only letting me stay there out of pity until i have the savings to afford bond on the rental that I want. I have a pity house."

"Okay, I'm going to talk to you, woman to woman," Arizona says as she sits down on the fair in front of Jo.

"O...okay," Jo replies anxiously.

Arizona places her hand on Jo's shoulder, "honey, Karev likes you."

"He... he likes me?" Jo questions confused.

Arizona nods her head, "he really, really, really likes you."

Jo takes a moment to decipher what Arizona had said, "Wait?!" She says shocked. "He likes me... as in romantically?"

"Ah, Yeah," Arizona says while nodding her head slowly.

"What? Why? Why would he like me? I'm... I'm... I'm complicated to say the very least, and I've been through a lot so I'm not exactly a happy person... I'm going to be seeing a shrink. Who wants to get involved with a person that has a shrink? I'm complicated and depressed, that's what I am. I mean, have you met his ex-wife? She's bright and bubbly and cheerful. You know, I bet she was the cheerleading captain in high school. I don't know why they ever got a divorce," Jo rambles.

"Alex and Izzie got a divorce because they weren't meant to be. There was always somebody else out there for them. And I'm...I'm not saying that they've found that person, I'm just saying that they weren't meant to be," Arizona explains in an upbeat tone.

Arizona smiles and gets up. She walks over to the door and opens it. She briefly looks back over at Jo before leaving the room. What was she supposed do with the information Arizona had just given her? She couldn't act upon it that's for sure.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter fourteen**

**4 weeks later- September 12th 2012**

 **7 weeks old**

It was 5am in morning when Jo's personal alarm clock woke her up. She begins to stir and turns on her nightlight. She sits up in her bed and smiles. As much as Jo never wanted to hear her daughter cry, those cries were exactly the thing that told Jo that her daughter needed her, and that made her feel so happy inside.

Just a few weeks ago Jo would have been to scared to pick her daughter up, or even touch her, but today, although somewhat hesitant, she kind of relished the chance. She promptly places her hands under her daughters back and lifts her up over to her chest. She cradled her daughter in her arms and within a few moments the little girl's cries became softer before not being heard at all.

While Jo still had a long way to go moving forward, the development was a good one on the parenting front. The past few weeks with Arizona had proved to be an invaluable experience for Jo and had seen her make leaps and bounds. She was so thankful that Arizona made the time and effort to help her recover. She had even helped Jo move into her own house. It was a small 3 bedroom, 2 story townhouse, But it had everything she needed It was only a short 15 minute drive to the hospital, and most of all it fit into her rental budget.

After offing her daughter the boob, Jo proceeds to place her back into the bassinet and gets up for the day. She couldn't believe that just one week ago she had started back at work. As a single mother, she couldn't afford to take any more time off work.

Thirty minutes later Jo emerged from the bathroom ready for the day. She looked over at her daughter, who was still asleep, so she decides to head downstairs to grab a cup of coffee and some toast for breakfast. As she walked down the darkened path to the kitchen, she turns on the lights to brighten the way.

It takes her ten minutes to prepare her breakfast and a further ten minutes to eat her toast. Jo ears perk up as she begins to hear her daughter cry. Jo sigh's and places her coffee cup down onto the counter. All she wanted to do was drink one cup of coffee uninterrupted.

She gets up from the counter and heads upstairs to attend to her daughter. One sniff of the nose informed Jo her she had let a bomb off in her nappy. Jo gathers her supplies, a new nappy, an armful of baby wipes, a pair of gloves, a plastic bag to put the nappy into and a pair of tongs to grab the nappy, because chances are that it was going to be full to the brim, and she wasn't going near that with her hands.

Several disgusting minutes had past and had changed the baby's nappy, that is with gagging several times. Jo cradled the baby on her chest and made her way downstairs, to where the baby capsule was. She loaded the baby up and then grabbed her bag, as well as the baby's bag. She heads to the garage where she loads everything up and then heads towards the hospital.

 **Scene break**

"Damn it, I forgot my coffee," Jo groans to herself as leads into the back seat of the car to grab out the baby.

"Hey," she hears a woman's voice say. Jo jumps a little and then turns around while holding her daughter on her chest and notices Steph was standing behind her.

"Crap, you scared me," Jo sighs.

"Hey, language around the baby," Steph points out.

"She is 7 weeks old. I highly doubt she'll go repeating it around day-care," Jo replies with an eye roll.

Steph gives a little chuckle and Jo tuns to face the pram to her side. Steph watches as Jo fastens the baby into it and Jo locks her car, "Are you coming or going?" she questions.

"Coming," Steph replies with a smile.

"Well, let's go," Jo orders. Jo begins to push the pram towards the hospital and Steph walks beside her.

"So, has she got a…."

"Don't even begin to ask me if she has a name yet, because she doesn't. She didn't have one yesterday, or the day before that, and she's not gonna have one today, tomorrow, or even the day after that," Jo interrupts.

"But you are working on it, right?" Steph questions.

"I'm sure that I don't need to remind you, but I'm not very motherly and all that. I am trying here, okay?" Jo replies stressfully.

"Okay," Steph replies. She allows the subject to be dropped and decides to focus Jo's mind on something else. "Who's service are you on today?"

"Uh, Izzie's," Jo replies

Steph nods her head, "I'm stuck with Karev."

"Karev isn't bad you know. He's one of the good one's. I honestly Can't believe that you've never been on his service," Jo replies amazed.

"Well, you can thank Girl Shepherd for wanting to keep me as her Neuro Mule. You can hate Dr Webber for wanting to giving me a freaking well rounded education as the reason why I am not on Girl Shepherd's service today,' Steph replies annoyed.

"Well, I neeeeeed coffee. I left mine in the stupid kitchen," Jo says.

"Language!" Steph reminds Jo.

"Again, she's seven weeks old. She ain't gonna repeat that," Jo reminds Steph.

 **Scene break**

"It's good to see you back Jo," Alex states as he walks over to Jo, who, after dropping the baby off at Daycare, was standing in the coffee cart line on the ground floor reception level.

"I've been back for a week," Jo states blankly.

"I know, but I haven't been here. I've been in Iowa visiting my mother," he reminds her.

"Oh, right," Jo replies with a firm nod of the head. "I can get her to stop crying now. And she no longer hates me... well, so doesn't hate me as much, so that's something."

"And you no longer hate her either? You like her now, right?" He asks hopefully.

"Well, I'm working on it," Jo admits depressingly.

Alex gives a little chuckle, "working on it?"

"Until you find yourself pregnant to the husband who almost beat you to death, then you don't get to judge how long it takes me to like the child," Jo replies. "Besides, I'm the depressing intern, haven't you heard?"

"No, I haven't heard that. I've been in Iowa," he states again.

"Oh, well, it's true," Jo confirms as she reaches the front of the coffee line.

"Decaf please," Jo asks the attendant.

"Decaf? Really? You don't strike as a Decaf person," Alex replies surprised.

"Just another downside of having a baby. I can't have regular coffee because the caffeine will pass through my milk and I don't want caffeinate my baby and keep her up all night, especially when I've just got her to somewhat like me," Jo states. The attendant hands Jo her coffee and she stands to the side.

"Wow, you really are depressing aren't you?" Alex asks curiously.

"Slightly less depressing then I was, the anti depressants have started to kick in some," Jo replies. "Anyway, I've gotta go, I'm on you Ex-wife's service!" Jo says excitedly.

"There's that excitement!" He shouts out as Jo walks away. As she walks away she turns and takes a few steps while backwards and showing Alex a smile before turning back around and walking properly.

She heads up to the OB wing of the hospital where she sees Izzie standing at the nurses station.

"Dr Stevens, good morning," Jo says as she approaches the blonde woman.

"Ah, good morning Dr Stadler," Izzie says as she looks up from her chart. "I know that you haven't been on my rotation before, but have you been on an OB rotation before?"

"Ah, no, I haven't. This is my first time," Jo replies.

"Okay, Well then, you've got lots to learn and you're lucky that I've got lots to teach," Izzie says with a smile.

"You are way too happy. Like inhumanly happy," Jo states.

"You'll get used to it. Now, let's go, we have a consult. Can you read me the chart?" Izzie asks as she passes Jo the chart and they begin to walk.

"Ah, Audrey Carmichael, 32. 37 weeks pregnant with her first child and has elected for a Cesarean birth which is booked for later today," Jo replies.

"Excellent," Izzie replies as they walk into Audrey's room. She was sitting on her bed and her husband was sitting on the chair next to her. "Audrey, Ethan, good morning. How are we today?"

"I can't wait to get this baby out of me," Audrey says excitedly.

"I understand. Now, this is DrJosephine Stadler, she's going to be assisting on your C section today," Izzie informs them while pointing to Jo.

"Hi," Jo says with a nod of the head.

"I have your blood work back and everything is on track. Do you have any questions?"Izzie asks with a smile.

"I think you've answered all of our questions more then once during our checkups," Audrey smiles.

"Well, if you think of anything else let the nurses know and they'll be more then happy to answer it, or they'll page me. If there's nothing else then Dr Stadler will see you for your pre op and to prep you for surgery at 3," Izzie smiles.

"There is just one thing," Audrey says.

"Anything," Izzie replies.

"It's for Dr Stadler," She prompts.

"Yes," Jo replies.

"Do you have children? I...I...I know Dr Stevens has three but I need to know if you have any. I...I don't know why but I just feel that my baby is so much safer in the hands of a mother... someone who's been where I'm going," Audrey explains.

"I Ah... I have a 7 week old," Jo replies.

"Okay, Good. Was it a smooth pregnancy? And how did you deliver? How's your recovery going? I...I just need to hear people's personal experiences to help put my mind at ease," Audrey blurts out.

"Hon, Dr Stadler might not want to share her personal experience," Ethan reminds his wife.

"You don't have to share," izzie says quietly.

"My Ah... my pregnancy was complicated. Not medically speaking, medically speaking it was smooth... but it was complicated because of my life. I tried for a vaginal delivery but had an emergency C section, and my recovery it's... um... well it's slow, again, because of my complicated life," Jo admits. The truth was that Jo was uncomfortable answering those questions, but she didn't want to close herself off to the patient. Patient connection is very important to establish and allows the patient to trust you more, which was especially important when you were holding their life in your hands.

"You have no idea how much better that makes me feel. Thank you Dr Stadler," Audrey replies.

Jo nods her head and gives a small smile.

"Rest up, we'll be back soon," Izzie says with a smile before she and Jo leave the room.

"How is the little one going?" Izzie asks.

"Well, she kind of likes me now and I'm working towards liking her. I haven't named her yet though," Jo replies.

"Good to hear you're making progress. It's a really slow day and you look like you could do with a sleep, a break or something, so go get yourself what ever you need. I'll page you if I need you before you start Audrey's prep at 3," Izzie replies with a smile.

"Wow, you being perky and cheerful has its benefits. I thought I was just going to be annoyed all day by your happiness, so thank you," Jo replies. Izzie gives a chuckle before Jo heads off towards the lunch room. She notices Alex was sitting down at an otherwise empty table and heads over to him and sits down.

"Will you go out with me?" Alex blurts out.

"I'm sorry, are you talking to me?" Jo asks as she looks around the room.

"Who else would I be talking to?" he asks.

"Alex, she is bright and bubbly, why did you get a divorce again?" Jo asks confused.

"It's complicated," Alex replies.

"And yet you've just asked me out? I'm 100 different kinds of complicated and I'm not exactly bright and bubbly," Jo replies confused.

"I know you are complicated Jo, and I know that you're not bright a bubbly. But I also know that I love you. It sounds like somebody else I used to know, and she's now married to Derek,"

"Alex, I'm sorry, but no. I have a seven week old, I'm trying to figure out motherhood. I... I... I'm coming out of a abusive Marriage that broke me... he broke me. And I'm not ready to open my heart up again, not while it's still broken. It's going to take me a long time before I trust somebody like that again. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is," Jo replies.

"It's okay. I get it. Robbin's told me that something like that might happen, so it wasn't like I wasn't expecting it. I just had to try, you know?" he asks.

"I know," Jo replies while nodding her head.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter fifteen**

 **That afternoon- September 12th 2012**

Jo's head was a mess and it was spinning. Everything and everybody around her began to move faster, and faster and faster, but yet she stayed completely still and unable to move.

Jo bends down and picks her her mobile phone, which she had dropped mere moments before.

"Dr Stadler, are you still there?" The voice asks.

"What do you mean he's out?" Jo questions.

"Paul's lawyer applied for, and received a good behaviour bond. There are certain rules that Paul has to follow. He's not allowed within 20 feet of the hospital, of your home and of you or your daughter. One violation will send him right back to prison. We will be watching him closely," she's informed by Constable Liam Woods.

Jo takes a deep breath in and out in an attempt to compose herself, "And he's filled for joint custody of the baby?" Jo asks.

"We have an ADA who specialises in family court cases. She will assist you with your case against Paul. I'm going to set a meeting up for you at 3pm today. Is that okay with you?" Liam asks.

"Yes, that's fine," Jo replies without hesitation.

"I will text you the address," Liam says.

"Thank you," Jo replies.

"And Jo, remember that you're not alone in this. You'll have our protection and we are doing everything that we can. Our ADA has filled a motion to dismiss the good behaviour bond, but the court date isn't for 2 days. I know I've asked you this a dozen times before, but you are surrounded by people who can support you, right?" Liam asks.

"I... I have my friends," Jo replies.

"Okay, good. I'll keep you informed," Liam replies. Jo hangs up the phone and continues to stand in the same spot as she continues to watch the hospital move around her.

It was a further ten minutes before the thought of moving even crossed Jo's mind, and as it did Dr Stevens walks over to her, "are you okay Stadler?" She asks.

"No, no I'm not," she admits, "I just found out that my husband got out of prison on a good behaviour bond and he's filled for custody. So no I'm not at all okay. My life just got ten times more shitty and depressing. Yay me!" Jo says with a sarcastic fist bump.

"Okay, clearly you're not in the right frame of mind for this surgery, I wouldn't be either. So I want you to take the afternoon off and I want you to take tomorrow off to sort some things out," she instructs.

"Dr Stevens, with all due respect, I can't financially afford to do that. I'm an intern and I have a baby. I really couldn't afford to take the 6 weeks off when I had her, but I had to do that because she needed to be 6 weeks old to attend the daycare. I have a meeting with a lawyer at 3pm today. I will be gone a few hours and then I'll be back to finish my shift," Jo replies firmly, "with all due respect, once again."

"Look, I understand the financial hardships of being a single mother, I really do. It's one of the reasons why I gave my daughter up when I was 16. I understand that you didn't want to do that, and I totally get it. But you are a single mother and there are certain responsibilities that come with that. You need to be able to afford to take time of when it's needed... life gets hard, especially in your situation and mental health is no joke... you need to look after you. And... and kids get sick, especially babies. Starting daycare exposes their immune system to all sorts of different viruses. You should go and talk to Bailey and figure something out," izzie says empathetically. Jo wipes a lone tear off their right cheek and nods her head.

 **Scene break**

The room, it was prim and proper, clean and crisp. It was everything that you'd expect a lawyers office to be, well at least the good ones anyway. Jo hoped with all of her might that this lawyer would take on her case, however given the fact that she was referred to this office from the police station, she knew that the likelihood was high.

"Dr Josephine Stadler," lawyer Sally Langdon says as she walks into her office. She was middle aged, quite tall and had blonde hair that was tied in a ponytail.

"That's me," Jo smiles as Sally proceeds to walk around to her large leather swivel chair on the other side of the desk.

"Pleased to meet you. Sally Langdon," Sally says with a smile as she extended her hand. Jo extends her hand and shakes her hand.

"Thank you for seeing me on such short notice," Jo says great-fully.

"That's okay. When Liam sent me your file and explained everything to me I knew I just had to help. What you've been through and what you are going through is hard for anybody and if I can help make this situation a little better then I've done my job," She replies as she sits down at her chair. "But I'm keen to hear you explain it to me," Sally opens up her notebook and grabs a pen from the cup holder to her right.

"My ah… my soon to be Ex Husband and I were married for almost 6 years. He was violet towards me. I ah…. I don't want to go into too much detail, but It was bad….. I feared for my life but yet I ah… I stayed. and I'm ashamed to admit that. We went out to a bar one night. When we go out I only have 1 drink, and there is a very good reason for that. But that night I let my guard down for some stupid, stupid reason and I had more then 1 drink and I got drunk. We went home and Had sex. I make it a rule not to have sex with my husband and yet that night I did, because I let my guard down and got drunk.

When I suspected I was pregnant I knew I had to get out. I had a plan. I was saving money to get out. I didn't tell Paul when I was pregnant and when he found out he was mad. A couple of weeks later He very was physical towards me, especially in the abdomen. I went to one of my superiors at the hospital and we got the police involved. I believe you know everything that has happened in regards to the case," Jo replies.

Sally nods her head, "Yes, Liam has filled me in. Now, we have a strong case, especially with the DV case pending. There is a good chance the the Judge will look at the case and throw it out. But, there is also a good chance that Paul will get supervised visits. I want you to be aware of that, however I am going to do everything in my power not to have that happen," Sally replies.

Jo takes a nervous gulp, "Okay," She says anxiously.

"I know that you're anxious and nervous. And that's okay, you have every right to feel that way, because it is going to be a long process. We will respond to the custody petition with our counter offer which I'm assuming will be sole legal and physical custody?" Sally questions.

"Yes," Jo replies with a nod of the head.

"We will then gather our evidence and will be given a court date, which could be a while away…. But when I file I'm going to file it as an emergency petition, which will speed up the process," Sally then continues to explain the process to Jo.

When Jo leave's the lawyers office her head is in a spin. Character witnesses? Where the hell was she going to get character witnesses to prove that she was a good mother. She barley liked her daughter and now she had to find people who were willing to stand up and say that she is a good mother... her daughter didn't even have a name yet.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter sixteen**

 **One week later- September 19th**

**8 weeks old**

She needed therapy, oh god, did she need therapy. She needed to pay somebody to help her deal with her crap. But yet why did she feel so bad being here and paying somebody to help make her problems disappear? It just didn't seem natural.

"Josephine? Josephine? Are you okay?" Dr Wyatt asks gently as Jo sits on the lounge in her office.

"I...I... I don't know what to say," Jo replies.

"How about you start from the beginning," Dr Wyatt prompts.

"I was a few weeks away from 19 when I met him... he was 39... I was in pre med..." Jo begins.

"I want you to start from your childhood. In order to get a sense of you as a person and to understand the choices you've made I need the full picture. It will help you to understand as well," Dr Wyatt explains.

"Okay, um... my mother left me at a first station when I was 2 weeks old. I've been in and out of over a dozen foster and group homes until I aged out of the system and even lived out of my car when I was 16 and I've been in and out of Juvie. The homes I was in... they were abusive and when I was 10 I had acute myeloid Leukaemia. I remember one safe home... I thought they were going to adopt me but then social services showed up one day and took me away... I was 13. The home I was in after that was the worst home I'd ever been in. I was raped and abused. He tried to rape me again and I pushed him back. He fell and hit his head. He pressed charges and I went to Juvie. I went to Juvie for 6 months for defending myself. I never had a chance to be believed, after all, all the judge see's is a file... that's all they ever see. It was a pretty horrible experience. Conditions weren't great and it was over crowded. When I got out I went to a group home. I stayed there until I was just shy of my 16th birthday. When I got out I went to another foster home but they kicked me out so I lived in my car," Jo explains.

"That must have been very hard for you. I'm so sorry that you had to go through it," he replies.

"It was incredibly hard. I'd never had a single second of anything real in my life and when I met Paul I did... or I thought I finally did," Jo replies.

"You said 'you thought.' Why's that?" Dr Wyatt asks.

"I guess because in the end he hit me... and he beat me. That's not love. I said 'I thought' because it wasn't real," Jo replies simply.

"How did you both meet?" Dr Wyatt asks curiously.

"We met in a bar..." Jo begins.

 **February 1st 2006**

18 year old Josephine Alice Wilson sits alone in a local tavern in Boston. Today she had begun studying her two year pre medical degree and was one step closer to achieving her dream of becoming a doctor. She hoped that somebody would be able to celebrate with her, anybody would do. They didn't have to be best friends, or even friends, just an acquaintance would be fine. But the truth was that she was alone, sadly for Brooke being alone wasn't a new concept, she'd been alone most of her life so what was it to be alone right now, celebrating one of her best achievements.

As Jo orders a sparkling water a gentleman sits next to her, "has anybody ever told you that your eyes light up your face," the man says.

"You haven't even seen my eyes," Jo says before turning to face the man. He was tall, had brunette hair and was very good looking. He ticked all of her boxes.

"Well now I have and I was right," he grins. Jo blushes just a little. "I'm Paul Stadler," he says.

"I'm Josephine Wilson," She smiles.

"Can I buy you another drink?" He asks. "What do you like?" He continues.

"Wow, you don't waste any time do you?" Jo asks looking at him inquisitively.

"Well, life is short and you're a very pretty lady. So can I buy you a drink?" He asks.

"Wow, you are a go getter aren't you," Jo says, "But um, no, but you can buy me this sparkling water," she says holding the Sparkling water up in her hand.

"Straight shooter, I like that," Paul says.

"Well there's no point in sugar coating things to a grown man now is there?" She says.

"Well no," he replies. "Now, what's a pretty lady like you doing sitting here drinking alone in a tavern?" He asks.

"I just started pre Med school today. I'm celebrating," she replies.

"You're celebrating alone?" He asks.

"I know, it's pathetic really. I could be at my apartment drinking sparkling water in the comfort of my own pyjamas and I could be watching cheesy soap operas, but yet I choose to get semi dressed up and come out to the tavern," she replies.

"It's not pathetic. Had you chosen to stay at your place I wouldn't of met you. And you are one of the prettiest women I have ever seen," he adds.

"You really are a go getter. You've known me for like five minutes and already you are flirting with me," she says.

"Well, like I said, life is short," he replies.

"If you're so interested in getting to know me then why don't you tell me something about yourself?" Jo asks politely.

"I 'm a general surgeon at Baltimore hospital. Research and innovation are what I'm passionate about. I grew up in Florida and I have two sisters, both younger, and an older brother, two cats, three birds and a very nice dog. My parents have been married for 41 years and are still very much in love," he says.

"Wow, that's more then I expected," Jo admits.

"I like to be upfront," He replies smiling. Jo looks at him blushing. She never thought he'd be so charming, and she never thought she'd meet the guy that she could possibly spend her life with in a bar. She'd known him for all of ten minutes and already she could picture a future with him, it was stupid and she knew it. But for some reason Jo couldn't get those thoughts out of her head. He was a handsome, charming man and she could see them together.

"Now, tell me about you," he says.

"Okay then. I'm a 18 year old Med student. I'm from right here in Baltimore. I've lived in many different houses. I have lots of siblings," she says. She wasn't lying to him, it was just what Jo wasn't saying that was key. She did live in many houses, they were just foster houses. And she had lots of siblings, just all of them were foster siblings that she had no contact with.

"Med student hey? So you're going to be a doctor?" He asks curiously.

"Um, surgeon actually," she says.

"It's not easy, I know. The hours are long and the pay sucks at first, but it does get better. What kind of surgeon do you think you'll be?" He asks her.

"I'm keeping my options open. I don't want to rule anything out until I try it," Jo remarks. "What made you pick General?" She asks curiously.

"I wanted to make a difference in the world buoy saving as many lives as possible, general was the best way for me to do that. I know you didn't ask, but for the record I didn't always want to be a doctor. I mean I once had surgery when I was nine and I didn't know what it was called until I was in Med school. All I remembered from that time was a very very sharp pain in my lower abdomen," Paul recalls.

"Ah, that would have been an appendectomy. It's one of the most common surgical procedures and it's so easy that even an intern could preform it. Well, that's what they tell me anyway. And I don't know why I said that because you'd already know that," Jo smiles. "Besides, you were nine and it was probably a very traumatic experience for you and our brains are programmed to block out and forget traumatic experiences. So it's not uncommon that you don't remember what the procedure was called," Jo says rambling. "Oh God, I'm rambling. Just stop talking Jo before you say too much," she says burying her head in her hands.

"You are the most beautiful, cute and funny person I have ever met," he grins.

"Say what?" She asks surprised.

"The way you over share and just keep talking without knowing when to stop is so cute. You are a beautiful girl and funny. You are as smart as you are beautiful, it's very intriguing," he replies.

 **End flashback**

Dr Wyatt hands Jo a tissue, she was beginning to become emotional, after all, recalling the moment where she thought she met her sole mate. Jo uses the tissue to dry her eyes and blow her nose and then holds it in her hands.

"You were in love," Dr Wyatt states.

"Wh...What?" Jo asks shocked.

"The way you just talked about him indicates that there was love at some point. When you spoke there was a tone in your voice and a sparkle in your eye. That tells me there was love at some point... that the love was real and that it wasn't always bad," she explains.

"No...I...I guess it wasn't," Jo replies faintly.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter seventeen**

**Two days later- September 21st 2012**

 **8 weeks and 2 days old**

 **Next therapy session**

"At our last session you said that it wasn't always bad. And it got me thinking... it wasn't always bad so it must be me. I'm the reason that it went bad. I was doing all of the things that made him upset. If only I kept my mouth shut and did what he asked, then maybe things would have been good," Jo muses as she sits on Dr Wyatt's lounge for the second time.

"No, no, when a man puts his hands on you, it is no way your fault. You are not in control of another person actions. They are," Dr Wyatt says sternly.

"I never saw my life working out this way. If i ever got married I never wanted to be divorced. And in the slim chance that I ever had kids I sure as hell didn't want to be the single divorced mother. I would see those kids all the time and they were broken. I would see those grown ups all the time and they looked stressed and unhappy. I never wanted that to be me. I was in the foster system, and it was crappy, but in my mind as soon as I aged out of the system everything would become better... I would meet an amazing guy, maybe get married, attend Pre med school and Med school, I would become a Surgeon and maybe, just maybe have a kid," Jo vents. "I couldn't control my life as a child, and that scared the living hell out of me everyday. But becoming an adult would be different. I would have all the control I needed."

Dr Wyatt nods, "I understand that it's frustrating, especially given that you had no control of your life as a child. Adulthood was your one safe haven... the one place that you'd be in control of your life."

"At the age of 18 I achieved a scholarship to attend pre med school and then I met Paul after I just started. To me it was life fate... like I was finally having control of my life. I knew when he was going to propose because he got me to pick out the ring... I made every single wedding choice. I was in control of my life... every last second was planned and accounted for and it was all going in the right direction," Jo exclaims.

"Please continue," Dr Wyatt gestures.

"And when he started to hit me I became powerless and my life was no longer in my control, he was controlling it. And now even though I'm free he's still controlling my life. I want to be the one in control. I need to be the one that is Meticulously planning every second of every day," Jo replies.

Dr Wyatt nods her head, "So you have some control issues. You like to be in control and not having that control takes you back and stems from a place of fear."

"Control issues? I do not have control issues," Jo replies unbelievably. "Just because I like to plan every second of my life, it does not mean I have control..." Jo pauses for a moment and looks at Dr Wyatt, " I have control issues," Jo sighs.

"And that's okay. Expected even after everything you've been through in your life. But it's important that you lean how to manage the amount of control. It's something we will do as we get further into therapy, but for now it's important that you regain control over what you've lost and that we work healing your emotional scars from Paul," Dr Wyatt replies.

"Well my soon to be ex husband is suing me for joint custody of my daughter... a daughter I haven't even named her yet... she doesn't even like me that much. He's out on a good behaviour bond and my divorce is the slowest moving divorce in the history of divorces," Jo vents frustratedly.

"Okay, let's talk about everything one at a time. You said that Paul is filling for joint custody of the baby. Do you have a court date?" She asks.

"It's 2 months away," Jo replies.

 **30 minutes later**

Jo sits down in the lunch room. In front of her sat her lunch tray which contained a ham and cheese sandwich, a can of lemonade and a chocolate pudding. Alex notices her from across the room and he walks over to her and he sits down across from her. He notices that her eye were red and she looked like she had been crying, "Are you okay Jo?" Alex asks as he asks

"No," she cries, "my shrink went all shrinky on me," she states.

"Oh... um... Do you wanna talk about it?" He asks nervously.

"And last week I was served with papers from Paul's lawyer... he's filled for joint custody of the baby," she says slowly.

"Wholly Freaking hell, can he even do that? Is that legal?" Alex questions shocked.

"He can And he has. He's out on a good behaviour bond and he's filled for joint custody. I have a court date in two months. My lawyer says I need character whiteness," Jo explains.

"Everybody in this hospital is on your side. Anybody here will stand up to the court and say that you're a good mother," Alex replies.

"But am I? She doesn't even have a name yet," Jo sighs.

"Yes you are. You're fighting to keep her and to keep Paul away from her. That makes you a freaking great mother," Alex says sternly.

"Paul is also trying to contest the divorce. He has a lot of money so he's got the best lawyers on it," Jo replies.

"So he'll leave you with nothing…" Alex begins.

Jo sighs, "I don't want anything from him... well actually I asked for the car that he brought for me and the house to be sold and money split. But I need the car How else am I supposed to get to work and get the baby places? He is contesting the divorce itself. He doesn't want a divorce. He wants to still be married to me."

"Wait, you have a car? What kind of car do you have? I have never seen it before. How have I never seen it before?" He asks shocked.

"Well, Paul hardly ever let me drive it. It's a Toyota Sienna," Jo begins

"Why'd he buy you a minivan?" Alex asks.

"I don't know. For the million kids I was supposed to have with him. I never approached the fact that children were a very slim maybe for me," Jo replies. "When I was staying with you the car was at Paul and I's house because the keys were inside and I didn't have house keys to get the car keys. Paul never trusted me to have house keys. But right before I started back at work the police obtained a court order to retrieve the keys from the house," Jo explains.

"Okay, but why doesn't he want a divorce?" Alex asks curiously.

"Control. He wants control of me. While we're married I can never really move on. My lawyers are working on it and I'm racking up a massive bill from them in the mean time. And it makes no literal sense as he filled for joint custody. He was joint custody of the child, but still wants to be a tied to me," Jo sighs.

"You might still be married to him but you are your own person, he doesn't own you and he doesn't control you anymore. It might feel that way but he doesn't. Take the power to control your own life. Take the power to make your life happy. You are responsible for your own happiness and success," Alex replies with a slight smile.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter eighteen**

**The next day- September 22nd 2012**

 **8 weeks and 3 days old**

"Hey you," Jo says as she approaches Alex, who was standing in the coffee van line of the hospital. In her right hand was the baby capsule that contained her daughter. On her left shoulder was her baby bag and her left hand contained a travel mug of decaf coffee.

"Wow, you seem... Are you okay? Because honestly you look like a hot mess. You don't plan on working like that do you?" Alex asks concerned. Her hair was all over the place, she had dark circles under her eyes and she was wearing a single that had a spit up stain on it.

"I am freaking tired. I got less then three hours of sleep last night," Jo replies frankly.

Alex takes a step forward and orders his coffee from the barista.

"Then why are you somewhat happy?" He questions.

"Her name is Phoebe Madeleine Stadler," Jo says with a slight smile.

Alex drops his jaw wide open in astonishment, "Wow Jo, that's beautiful. I didn't realise you were close to a name for her. I thought you'd take it down to the wire."

Jo laughs and gives a smile, "I wasn't. She woke me up at 3am this morning and was screaming for the boob. As she was feeding and had settled down I was thinking about what you said... about being responsible for my own happiness and success and not to let him control my life anymore and her name just came to me. And when I said it out loud her eyes made contact with mine and through all the milk sucking she was doing she smiled and I just knew."

"Well, that's great Jo. It's huge progress," he replies.

"Don't expect to see this happy me all the time. Happy me is an endangered species until dark and depressing me can go away and I don't think it can go away until everything involving Paul has settled. But I'm working on it. And me working on it and combined with the anti depressants has got to make progress, right?" She questions.

"Absolutely," Alex smiles. He grabs his coffee from the barista. "I'll see you later," he continues before starting to head away.

"Hey Alex," Jo calls out.

Alex turns around, "Yes," he replies.

"Will you be a character whiteness in my custody case?" She questions.

Alex nods his head, "of course Jo. Just tell me when and where and I'll be there."

"Thank you," Jo replies gracefully.

Alex smiles at her before walking away. After dropping Phoebe off to daycare Jo head down to the locker room, where she was sure all of her friends would be.

"Wow, Jo, you look like a hot mess," Steph comments as she notices Jo walking into the lounge.

Jo looks over to Steph and places her bag down onto the seat in front of her locker, "Well Phoebe kept me up all night," she replies as she begins to rummage through her bag in search for some lipstick.

"Phoebe?" Steph questions with a smile. "Have you finally named your child?"

Jo briefly looks up at her, "I have. Phoebe Madeleine is her name." Jo looks back down at her bag and continues to search for her lipstick. "Where is it? It can't be that hard to find!" Jo says to herself.

"You just told me that you named your child. You could be a little happier," Steph states.

Jo rolls her eyes and looks up at Steph with a forced smile, "I'm smiling, I'm happy. Now where the hell is my lipstick."

"No," Steph laughs, "you look like a serial killer."

"Yes! Here it is!" Jo says victoriously as she pulls out her red lipstick from her bag. She applies it up to her lips and places it back into her bag.

"I've got my custody case in 2 months. My lawyer says I need character whitnessess, will you be one for me?" Jo questions.

"Of course," Steph replies. "Jo, you shouldn't be worried. You're a great mother."

"It's just hard to believe that sometimes, you know?" Jo replies.

"I know it is, but you have to believe it, because it's true."


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter nineteen**

 **2 months later- custody case**

 **November 24th 2012**

**16 weeks and 5 days old**

"Wh... what if I don't win? What if he wins?" Jo asks Steph frantically as she passes back and forth in the woman's bathroom that was located on the third floor of the Seattle court house.

"Jo, you're panicking and right now there is nothing to panic about. You said yourself that your lawyer said that Paul has little hope of winning, especially with the domestic violence case pending," Steph says as she watches Jo pace down the bathroom.

Jo scoffs, "his lawyer Steph, he is going to play dirty. I've done some stuff in my life that I'm not proud of... I was a foster kid, my file is as big as Olympic national park. It was expunged when I turned 18 but what happens if somehow he got his hands on my file and gets it admissible in court?" Jo frantically asks.

Steph walks over to Jo and places her hand on Jo's shoulder, "Then your lawyer will deal with it Jo, it's her job. Now, you need to pull yourself together because your due inside that courtroom in less then 5 minutes."

Jo nods her head quickly. She washes her face with some cool water and then dries it using paper towel. She looks into the mirror and takes a deep breath, "Let's go."

Steph nods her head and follows Jo out of the bathroom. They meet Alex, Meredith, Arizona and her lawyer, Sally Langdon outside of the court room and Sally leads them into the room where they see Paul, his Lawyer, Joseph Barrett, Paul's mother, Louise, his father, Michael and his esteemed co-workers Dr Elizabeth Miller and Dr Patrick Friedman. As Jo walks down to take her seat she sustains glares from Louise and Michael that send chills down her spine.

Judge Donald Chambers enters the court room and walks up to his seat. He swears both parties in and sits down. In front of him were 2 files.

"We are here today to discuss the custody of a minor, Phoebe Madeleine Stadler. Mr Paul Joseph Stadler, you have filled for joint legal and physical custody of Phoebe," Judge Chambers says as he looks over at Paul. He then looks over at Jo, "and Mrs Josephine Alice Stadler, you have counter filled for full legal and physical custody of Phoebe." Jo nods her head.

"Now, what we have in front of us is an unusual case, give the fact that both parties are legally married, however I am aware that papers have been filled with the state and are being contested," Judge Chambers states.

"Your honour, Josephine did send divorce papers some time ago, however Mr Stadler is contesting the divorce as he does not want one," Sally says.

"Mr Stadler believes that a marriage is worth fighting for. He is a devoted Christian and divorce is considered a Sin. He wants to make sure that all possible avenues are explored before obtaining a divorce. He Believes that Mrs Stadler is done fighting for their marriage and fears that she may take off with his child. He has had no contact with Phoebe since birth. He is here today to protect his right to see his child while fighting for their marriage." Mr Barrett explains.

"This case was landed with me this morning so bear with me while I look over each file," Judge Chambers pulls down both files from the top of his bench and opens them. He quickly reviews the, to ensure the facts given by each lawyer was correct.

"Mr Stadler, Seattle state law requires that a divorce in motion, meaning that both parties have signed papers and they are being processed. order to pursue a custody case. How you made it through this process is astounding. Mr Stadler, if you so wish to file for Joint legal and physical custody of your daughter Phoebe, then you must be okay with signing the divorce papers. You can sign them now and I'll file them with the court. The divorce will then be in motion and you'll be back on my docket this afternoon," he explains.

Paul takes a moment to talk to his lawyer while Jo anxiously looks back at her friends. "Your Honour, I would like to do the right thing and honour Josephine's wishes. It is clear to me that she is not fighting for our marriage and my number one priority is Phoebe," Paul informs him.

 **Scene break**

"Did you hear him in there! 'My number one priority is Phoebe.' What a load of rubbish! He's just trying to paint himself as a good guy in front of the judge so he gets what he wants!" Jo vents to everybody as they walk down the front steps of the courthouse.

"At least he signed the divorce papers Jo," Alex says in an attempt to get her to look at the brighter side of things.

"That is not the point Karev. The point is that he did it in front of the judge to make himself the good guy. It was so egotistical!" She says back frustratedly.

"It wasn't the best way to go about it, but he has assault charges that are pending trial. There is no way he is going to get joint custody of Phoebe. As we've discussed, at the very worst he'll get supervised visits," Sally reminds her.

Jo takes a deep breath and nods her head.

"I suggest you all re-group, grab something to eat. We don't see Judge Chambers until 3pm, that's 3 hours away," Sally suggests before heading off.

 **Scene break**

"Firstly I would like to welcome back both parities to my courtroom. You've been sworn in and you may take a seat," Judge Chambers says before sitting down in his seat. "I have read the Character statements given on behalf of Both Josephine and Paul. I would like to thank those who contributed."

"Your honour, I'd like to request Dr Robbin's to take the stand," Mr Barrett asks.

Sally promptly stands up, "objection Your Honour. This isn't a civil trial, it's a custody case."

"Dr Robbin's was Ms Stadler's doctor throughout her pregnancy and it has come to my attention that she is still treating Ms Stadler," Mr Barrett explains.

"I'll allow it, only for medical information. Nothing personal," Judge Chambers warns. Arizona slowly stands up and makes her way to the stand and takes a seat.

"Ms Stadler has been depressed, has she not?" he asks Dr Robbins.

Arizona looks at him stunned, she couldn't believe that he was trying to obtain this information from her. She looks up at the Judge, "sir, this is confidential information. I can't share that."

"Dr Robbin's, you may answer the question," the Judge replies.

Arizona sighs, "Josephine has a medical condition known as Post natal Depression. It's common and effects every 1 in 100 new mothers, especially in her situation. She is being treated with therapy and anti depressants. Post natal depression is treatable and we are treating Josephine's. She is showing massive progress. It's commendable," Arizona states.

"That is all," Mr Barrett states.

"You May step down Dr Robbin's," The Judge instructs.

Arizona scoffs and heads back to her seat. "Your Honour, we'd like to show exhibit A, Ms Stadler's file," Mr Barrett says as he places his hand on a large stack of files.

"Your Honour!" Sally protests.

"We'd like to establish character and to establish weather or not Ms Stadler is a fit mother," he explains.

"Ms Stadler's record was sealed and expunged Your Honour," Sally states.

"We received express permission from the previous judge on this case. It's all in the file," he states.

Judge Chambers looks at the documents in front of him and indeed comes across permission to have the records un-expunged and made usable for this court case. "Go ahead," he instructs.

"Ms Stadler has been in the foster system since birth. She not once had a stable home as a child. At the age of 12 she was placed in Juvenile detention for setting fire to her foster father's car. She served 6 months and was then placed in a group home where she was there for 2 months before running away. She stole food from a local store and assisted a guy to rob the same store. She was found and landed herself back in Juvie for a further 4 months. She went to another group home and stayed for 1 year until she was found healthy enough to return to a regular home. Assault at the age of 15 and went to Juvie once again for 6 months. Ms Stadler is not a responsible citizen and with such a troubled youth she has the tendency to repeat mistakes she made then, as as adult. Can you trust somebody like that with the welfare of a child?" Mr Barrett questions.

"Ms Stadler has straightened her life out. She graduated high school as valedictorian, she graduated cum laude from Princeton University and Harvard Medical School. She is now working as a surgical resident at Grey Sloan Memorial, which is the most sought after residency match," Sally says in defence. "And Judge, May I bring your attention to the charges against Mr Stadler, multiple counts of domestic violence towards Ms Stadler," Sally says. She walks over to the Judge and hands him the case file. He opens up the folder and spends a further ten minutes looking through the evidence against Paul.

"Please stand," he requests. Jo, Paul and their lawyers stand.

"Given the severity of the charges against Mr Stadler, I hereby award Full legal and physical custody of Phoebe Madeleine Stadler to Ms Josephine Stadler, with Mr Paul Stadler award supervised visitation every Saturday for the maximum amount of 6 hours. This will remain in place until the case pending against Mr Stadler goes through the judicial system, at which point the terms of this custody arrangement shall be re-evaluated," Judge Chambers bangs his gavel and stands up.

Jo and Paul turn to their respective supporters and chatter begins to fill the room.

"Jo, it's okay, we knew that this was going to be a possibility," Sally says as she notices the shocked look on Jo's face.

"Okay, so what happens now? How does this work?" Arizona asks.

"Supervised visitation will happen in a controlled setting at the family centre. Jo will nominate a third party to be the supervisor, it could be a friend, family member or a social worker designated by the state. Jo will bring Phoebe to the family centre by the time that the judge has stated. She will hand Phoebe over to the nominated third party and then return to the family centre at the designated pick up time," Sally explains.

Jo nods her head and looks over at Paul, who was glancing at her with rage building up in his face. "Hey Jo, just ignore him. Don't let him get to you. He's not worth it," Steph says as she places her hand on Jo's shoulder.

Jo looks back at Steph, gives a small smile and nods her head.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter twenty**

 **Three days later- November 27th**

 **17 weeks old**

"I'm late, I'm late, so late!" Jo says frustratedly to herself as she quickly unloads Phoebe's car seat from the car. Normally Jo would buckle the car seat onto the pram, but she had no time to spare today. She was supposed to start work 20 minutes ago, however Phoebe let off a land mine in her nappy right before she was due to leave. She had also hit traffic on the way and after being frazzled by Phoebe's larger then life bowel motion she had left her iPhone charger at home, and a dead phone battery meant that she couldn't call the hospital.

After grabbing out Phoebe she frantically pulls out the baby bag and locks the car. She rushes into the main entrance of the Hospital while holding Phoebe in her car carrier using her right hand. When she enters the hospital she bumps the bag against a pot plant, causing it's overflowing contents to spill out. "Crap," Jo whispers to herself.

She bends down and places the baby carrier down next to her and begins to pick up baby toys, Hey car keys and various other baby products that had spilled out. "Here, let me help you," Jo hears a male voice say. She feels her hand come into contact with his and they both look up. As they both make eye contact they instantly recognise one another.

"Josephine Wilson," he says stunned as he passes her a small toy elephant.

Jo takes the elephant from him and places it into her bag and continues to look at him, unable to move, "Christopher Cleaver," Jo says stunned.

"You know my surname isn't actually Cleaver, right?" He jokes.

"Yes, of course," Jo replies.

"What are you doing here? Is everything okay? You're not sick are you?" He rambles.

"No, um, I'm late... work. I work here," Jo stutters.

"Oh, okay, good," he replies relieved. The last thing he wanted was for Jo to be sick.

"Um, why are you here? Is everything okay?" She asks.

"My sister had surgery yesterday. Nothing major she just had her adenoids and tonsils removed," he replies.

Jo smiles, "Okay good," She pauses for a briefing moment, "Look, I'm late. Like really super late. But if you're still here later I think it would be good if we talked?"

Chris nods his head, "Okay." Jo quickly stuffs the rest of the toys into her bag and stands up. She flings the baby bag over her shoulder and picks up the baby carrier before heading towards the lift.

She couldn't believe that she'd just saw Chris again. It had been 9 years since she'd seen him last and the final memory he'd have of her was her never showing up to take him to College, instead fleeing out of the state.

Jo settles Phoebe into daycare and gets ready in the locker room. Once she was ready she heads of to find Meredith Grey, who was at the west wing Nurses station on floor 2 waiting for her.

"Stadler, you're late," Meredith states as she spots Jo heading towards her.

"I know, and I'm sorry. Phoebe dropped the largest bowl motion in her nappy as soon as we were about to walk out the door. Seriously, it was huge. I'm pretty sure It could of broken records. Anyway, then I hit traffic on my way in and my phone was dead and I forgot to bring the charger through all the chaos so I couldn't call," Jo explains.

"Always keep a charger in your car, that's 'Mum rule number one.' Forgetting one is something you never want to do, especially with a baby. You never know what will happen," Meredith says.

Jo nods her head, "Okay, got it."

Meredith hands Jo the tablet, "Melissa Mullen, 18. In after a joint tonsillectomy and adnoidectomy," Jo says as she reads the chart.

"And why did she stay overnight?" Meredith questions.

"She has a clothing disorder, Haemophilia B. She's had it since she was 6 and was admitted for an overnight stay to monitor this," Jo explains.

"Okay, excellent," Meredith praises as they enter Melissa's room.

"Melissa, how are you doing today?" Meredith asks as she and Jo stand at the end of her bed.

"In a little pain, but surprisingly not too much," she replies.

"That's great to hear. This is Dr Josephine Stadler, she is going to walk me through your post op," Meredith says.

"Melissa Mullen. Post op day one of a tonsillectomy and adnoidectomy. She was admitted for an overnight stay due to a cloting disorder, Haemophilia B..." Jo begins. She heard footsteps enter the room and in come Mrs and Mr Mullen, Elise and Patrick respectively. Chris followed behind them.

"Oh my gosh, Josephine," Elise says stunned.

"Hi Mrs Mullen," Jo says awkwardly. "I know you probably didn't expect to see me, but I'm sorry for what I did," Jo says.

"Stadler, Do you know each other?" Meredith questions.

"I dated their son, Chris while in high school and I kinda just took off without a word," Jo replies slowly.

"You're a Doctor now?" Elise asks cautiously.

"Well, I'm an surgical intern," Jo replies awkwardly. Jo looks up at Melissa's vitals and notes them down on her tablet. "Your vitals are looking good and blood work came back this morning indicating high clotting factors. It basically means that the medication they gave you prior to surgery to help your blood clot around your wound sites is working. We'll do a repeat blood test in four hours and if the numbers become higher then you can go home," Jo advises Melissa.

"Okay, thank you," Melissa replies.

Jo nods her head and She and Meredith begin to leave the room. As Jo reaches the doorway she is stopped by Chris.

"Could we talk to catch up when you have lunch?" He asks.

"Chris, do you really think that's a good idea?" Patrick asks.

"Mum, dad, it's fine, it's been nine years. I've got no hard feelings," Chris replies.

"Sure," Jo replies with a smile. She nods her head before continuing on with rounds.

 **Scene break**

"I never thought I'd see you again," Chris musses as he sits with Jo in the lunchroom of the hospital.

"I know, me either. And that's my fault I guess... taking off like that," Jo admits.

"Why'd you do it? Why'd you just leave without a word. I'm well over it now, but back then it hurt a lot and I guess I just want to know why you did it," he asks.

"Because you scared me. You said all this stuff about the future and how you wanted to have everything your family had, with me... a fancy house... marriage and kids. You knew that I wasn't even sure that children were in the cards for me... or even marriage. You wanted it all with me and It scared me, I lived in my car... I was a girl who was used to running, so I ran," Jo admits.

"Okay, I can see how that would of freaked you out," he replies. All of a sudden he bursts out in laughter.

"What? What?" Jo asks with a grin.

"I was just thinking about the time when Jesse Hanson broke into your car while you were in class and took out everything you owned and left it all over the gym..." he begins.

Jo begins to chuckle, "and we got revenge at him by egging his car that night and dumping rotten fish in his car through the crack of the window he'd left down."

"He spent months trying to get the fish smell out," he laughs.

"Oh god, how could I forget. He never told a soul that it was us because he knew the school would give him crap for picking on the homeless girl," Jo adds through laughter.

"Remember in health class how we had to look after a baby over the weekend?" He asks.

"How could I forget? We had to name it and I named mine Mildred, what was I thinking?" She laughs.

"Your electronic baby came back covered in dirt, it's onsie was in shreds. She was missing both eyes, her arm was out of its socket and it's head was holding on by a thread," he remembers.

"I was homeless. I couldn't exactly keep it alive while living in my car. I was barley able to keep myself alive. That's exactly how a real kid would look after spending a weekend in that car," she laughs.

"Who is that guy?" Alex asks as he points his head over to where Jo and Chris were having lunch. He was sitting a few tables away from Jo and Chris with Arizona.

"I don't know," Arizona replies.

"She looks happy. Does she look happy to you? She's laughing and smiling, so doesn't laugh and smile over little things. That's not something that she does," Alex states while continuing to look over at the pair.

"What are we all looking at?" Meredith asks as she walks over to Alex and Arizona and sits down at their table.

"Alex is jealous of the guy that's making Jo Laugh and smile and be happy," Arizona informs Meredith.

"Who is that guy anyway?" Alex asks.

"That is Christopher Mullen. His 18 year old sister is in the hospital after Adenoid and Tonsil removal," Meredith says.

Alex rolls his eyes, "Great, she's making googling eyes with a patients brother."

"Well, Jo did rounds with me this morning and they appeared to know each other. They dated in high school," Meredith shrugs.

"Let's hope I do a better job now, although I'm not entirely sure I will," Jo adds.

"The baby you had this morning, is she yours?" Chris asks Jo.

"She is. Phoebe, she's 4 months old," Jo smiles.

"Wow, that's just amazing," He gushes, "I must admit, I never expected to see you with a child. When we spoke about children you always said that they were a slim possibility, although I was hoping to change your mind."

"Oh trust me, Phoebe wasn't planned and I'm still adjusting to motherhood. It's been a struggle... a really long depressing struggle. It's like a battle everyday, but I'm getting better now... I hope," she replies honestly.

"Well I'm sure your husband is a huge help," he comments.

"Husband?" Jo questions.

Chris feels his face going red, "Oh sorry. I just assumed that you were married. They've been referring to you as Dr Stadler rather then Dr Wilson."

"It's okay. I am still technically married, although not for too much longer... Papers have been filled now we're just waiting," Jo replies.

"I'm so sorry. That must be incredibly hard, especially with a child," Chris replies.

"There's nothing to be sorry for. Paul is an awful, awful man who abused me physically and emotionally. He almost ended my life," Jo replies.

"You don't deserve that, nobody does, I'm so sorry," he replies.

"That's enough about me, what about you and your life? Did you complete law school?" She questions.

He smiles, "I did. I Specialise in family court cases."

"That's great. Congratulations," Jo smiles. "Is There a special someone in your life?"

Chris gives a little chuckle, "There was, but Lydia cheated on me with my best friend."

"Oh man, you're kidding! That sucks. You were one of the best people that happened to me, I can't believe she'd throw it all away," Jo replies shocked.

"Sounds like someone else I know. Except she didn't cheat, she ran away," he says.

Jo gives a chuckle, "I should listen to myself ore often then, hey?"

"Hey um, would you ever consider going out on a date with me again?" He asks curiously.

"Like in the immediate future?" She questions.

"Or ever," he replies.

"Chris, I'm flattered, I really am. But I'm just not ready. And it's not because of our history. It's because I'm just coming out of an abusive marriage. I need time to heal, time for myself. I need to figure out this motherhood thing and it needs to be just me and my daughter for a while. It's going to take me a long time to open up my heart again like that, especially when it's been shattered," Jo replies.

"Have you got a good support system here? Somebody in your corner?" He asks curiously.

"I do, Yes," Jo replies with a nod of the head.

"Now you've got one more," he smiles.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter twenty two**

 **December 18th**

It had been a busy day, and after 20 hours on the go, Jo was over due for a date with her daughter. "Jo!" Alex shouts out. Jo turns around to see Alex rushing towards her.

"Crap," Jo mutters what she thought was quietly.

"I'm sorry? Not who you wanted to see?" Alex questions.

"No.. it's just Ah..." Jo begins, "what were you after?"

"I have a ostoscaroma on a 16 year old that I'm about to prep for? Would you like to scrub in?" He asks with a smile.

"No, I do not. Ive been working 20 hours straight and I still have another 10 to go. Right now my schedule is completely clear. Not one patient needs me so I'm going up to daycare to spend some time with my daughter. I need to see her, squish her cubby cheeks, smell her little puffs of strawberry blonde hair, smother her in kisses and touch her tinny tiny baby toes. So, that's what I'm going to do," Jo replies assertively.

"Well, That sounds equally wonderful," Alex replies with nod of his head.

"It sounds even better then that ostoscarcoma, now if you'd excuse me, I'm going to go and love my baby right now," Jo smiles. She nods her head assertively before walking off.

As she heads towards the lift she begins to walk closer to an elderly woman, a woman that she'd recognise anywhere. A woman that she hadn't seen since she graduated high school and the expression on her face indicated that she felt exactly the same way.

"Oh my goodness, Josephine!" She exclaims as they draw to an arms length of each other.

"Miss Schmidt!" Jo says excitedly. They instantly give each other a hug and when they break apart Miss Schmidt stands back and admires Jo.

"Oh my, look at you all grown up!" She exclaims.

Jo gives a little laugh, "I know."

"Give us a look at that I.D badge. I need to see those credentials written down," Heather orders. Jo gives a smile and unclips her badge from her lab coat pocket and hands it to Heather. "Dr Josephine Stadler M.D ," she smiles. "Well done, I am so very very proud of you. You know, I knew that you could make your dreams come true one day."

"You were the only one who ever believed in me, thank you," Jo smiles.

"Now honey it seems like I've missed a lot, loosing touch with you was one of the most devastating moments I've ever had. Just when did you get married my love?"

Jo smiles uncomfortably. She didn't want miss Schmidt to find out that she'd been married to Paul. Jo knew that she shouldn't feel ashamed, every part of her head was telling her that. But her heart was telling her otherwise. When she left high school she was a very strong woman, that was who Heather knew her as, and that woman would of never of been in her position. "Oh, um, a couple of years ago now."

"Congratulations," she replies with a smile. "You will have to show me some photos."

"Oh, well, um, atully," Jo stutters, "we're getting a divorce. He was um... he was abusive towards me," Jo admits.

"Then you are even stronger then I thought you were," Heather smiles.

"Really?" Jo asks.

"Yes really. It takes a lot of strength and courage to get yourself out of a bad situation," she replies.

Jo nods her head with a small smile. "Wait, why are you here? This is a hospital, it's for sick people. You're not sick at you?" Jo questions.

"Oh, no, no. I was speaking to the chief about possibly doing a school trip here," she replies.

"Oh, okay, yay!" Jo smiles. "Oh, I can give a little speech and show them around. Maybe take them into surgery," she grins excitedly.

Heather gives a little chuckle, "Jo, they're 15 year olds. Not Med students."

"Oh, right," she laughs.

"But hey, maybe you can give them a lesson on the reproductive organs?" Heather grins.

"Um, um..." Jo stutters.

"It's okay, I was kidding," Heather laughs.

"Okay good," Jo laughs. "I hated getting that talk and I'm sure I'd hate giving it even more."

"Are you free for something to eat?" Heather asks.

Jo smiles, "I'm on my way up to daycare to see My Ah... my... my beautiful baby, Phoebe..."

"Oh my gosh, Jo, congratulations," Heather smiles. "How old is she?"

"She is 5 months old," Jo smiles.

"Well, I won't keep you from her. I bet she can't wait to see her mummy. Now, how about we exchange numbers?" Jo nods and smiles. They exchange phones and they punch in each other's numbers and hand back the phones.

"It was great to see you again Miss Schmidt," Jo smiles.

"Oh Josephine, don't be silly. You're not in high school now sweetheart, you don't have to call me Miss Schmidt. Heather is just fine," she smiles.

"Oh, right," Jo laughs.

"Now go and see your baby," she orders.

"Would you like to meet her now? I'd really like you to meet her," Jo asks curiously.

 **Scene break**

"Which one is Phoebe?" Heather asks curiously as she and Jo stand in the window of the daycare.

"She's right there on the mat. She's the one in the pink onesie with the purple skirt," Jo smiles proudly as she points to Phoebe, who was lying on her back on the mat.

"She is adorable," Heather grins.

"Come on, let's go see her," Jo grins. Heather follows Jo Into the daycare.

"Ah, Josephine, it's great to see you," Miss Louise says as she notices Jo walking in with Heather.

"This is Heather, she was my teacher in high school," Jo smiles.

"It's great to meet you," Louise says.

"Likewise," Heather replies.


	22. Chapter 22

**Here is the final chapter of 'For you now'. I hope you all enjoyed and thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of the reviews, follows and favourites.**

 **ButterflySparkle97**

 **Chapter Twenty two**

 **December 25th**

 **5 months old**

The sun was rising and beaming into Jo's room, the light bouncing off her hair and radiating through it. You'd be forgiven if you thought today was just like any other day, but it wasn't just like any other day. Today was special, it was December 25th, Christmas, and Jo was determined to make it the best day she possibly could for her baby girl's first Christmas.

Jo begins to stir in her bed, and over the course of five minutes, she manages to sit up. She looks over to her right and see's Phoebe still fast asleep. The sight of her precious daughter sleeping made Jo's heart full of happiness. She couldn't help but stare at her daughter for the next ten minutes before deciding to get up and start the day.

Jo makes her way to the bathroom and gets undressed and hops into the shower. She turns the water onto a warm temperature and lets the warm water run over the shower.

It was while doing this that Jo couldn't help but reflect on the past year. Why was it that some of her best thinking always happened in the shower? She thought about how hard the past year had been and how thankful she was that it was now mostly in the past. She thought about the beautiful daughter she had, and the long bumpy road it took her to get into the swing of motherhood. She thought about all the love and support she received from everybody at the hospital and she couldn't be more grateful for it, because if it weren't for them she'd be stuck raising her child in a unhappy and unsafe marriage.

Jo's thoughts were interrupted when she heard Phoebe begin to cry. "I'm coming baby girl!" Jo calls out as she turns off the shower water. She quickly throws a towel around herself and walks out to the bedroom. "Aw, there there," Jo says in a babyish tone as she picks up Phoebe.

One hour had gone by and Jo and Phoebe were finally ready for their first Christmas. Jo had never been one to celebrate Christmas, but as a mother she knew that it was her duty to give her daughter the most magical day, even if she wasn't even 1 yet. Jo smiles as she looks at the Christmas outfit that made Phoebe look like Mrs Claus.

"Alright baby girl, let's let the magic begin," Jo grins. She whisks her daughter off the change mat and heads downstairs to the Christmas tree. The green tree was elegantly decorated with fairy lights, gold and silver tinsel and Baubles. Underneath the tree there were five presents, each of which were for Phoebe. They were wrapped in Christmas paper and each present had a pink bow on top of it. "Now darling angle. They're all for you," Jo says as she points to the presents under the tree, "and you will will get to open them soon, just right after mummy has her coffee."

Jo heads to the kitchen and places Phoebe into the rock 'n' play that was next to the small four seater dining set. She buckles her up and walks over to the counter and makes her coffee.

When Her coffee was done, Jo heads back over to Phoebe. Jo sighs as she see's that Phoebe was now sleeping in her bouncer. "Christmas pooped already, hey?"

 **5pm**

"Oh, you like your bouncer don't you?" Jo laughs as she watches Phoebe play in her new bouncer activity set. Phoebe's face held the the worlds largest smile as she reached out and grasped the toys that were attached to the bouncer as she sat in the centre.

In the background Children's Christmas carol's were playing and filling the room.

All of a sudden Jo hears her doorbell ring, "I wonder who that could be?" Jo says to Phoebe. She stands up and makes her way to the front door. She looks out of the doors eyehole and see's Alex. She unlocks the deadbolt on the door and opens it.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" She asks shocked.

"Well firstly I wanted to come and check in on you," he states.

"Aw," Jo says touched, "that's very sweet of you. We're doing great," she adds with a smile.

He looks at her curiously, "Christmas carols? I know that you're making real progress, but you really don't strike me as a Christmas carol kind of person."

"It's Phoebe's first Christmas. It's just her and I and I know it's stupid, given the fact that she won't remember any of it, but I just wanted to make it magical for her. I feel like she deserves it, you know?" Jo asks.

"It's not stupid Jo. And Phoebe might not remember it, but You'll always remember your first Christmas as her mother," Alex smiles. Jo smiles back at him. "And you're not alone. Everybody that has kids is at Meredith's celebrating. It's kind of a last minute thing so it's nothing fancy, just families hanging out. Would you like to come?"

"You don't have kids, so why are you going?"

"Dude, it's mandatory for me to be at every party or gathering Meredith has. And having kids is not a mandatory requirement to attend. I just said that to make it appeal to you as a mother," he laughs.

Jo looks over at her daughter and then looks back at Alex. "That sounds great. We'd love too. Although, Phoebe has has a big day. It wouldn't surprise me if she's passed out from being milk drunk by 8," she laughs.

 **At Meredith and Derek's house**

"Jo, I'm so glad that you could make it," Meredith smiles as she greats Jo, Alex and baby Phoebe at the door.

"Thank you for having Phoebe and I," Jo replies with a smile.

"No problem," Meredith says as they walk through the door. She shuts the door behind them and heads back to the living area of her and Derek's house.

Jo looks around and notices that everybody was gathered in the living area. The children were playing in the middle while the adults were sitting around the outside. One the way over Jo made a mental list in her mind about who she thought would be here, and everybody she thought that would be, were here.

Jo takes a deep breath in and heads down to the living area and sits down next to Arizona and Callie. "Hey, you came," Arizona says happily.

"I thought I'd make a good Christmas even better," Jo smiles.

Arizona lets out a huge smile, "I'm so proud of you Jo. You've come so far in the past months. And I know that you still have a long way to go, and a lot of emotional scars and trauma to work through, but you're enjoying your daughter, and I love seeing that."

"Thank you," Jo smiles. She grins and gives Arizona a hug.

"How about we play a game?" Meredith suggests with a grin.

"Knowing you it's going to involve drinking," Alex points out.

"Oh totally," Arizona agrees.

"I can't drink. I don't make enough to pump and dump," Jo announces while pointing at her boobs.

Alex smirks, "don't worry, you won't have to."

"Let's move to the table, Derek will get the booze," Meredith grins.

"Right, I will get the booze," Derek confirms. Everybody stands up and heads to the table.

Izzie grabs Alex's arm on the way over and stops him. "You okay?" He asks as he looks back over at her.

"I saw the way you just looked at her. I just want to say that I know it's hard... waiting for the right person. And the way you look at her is with such respect and love. She's worth the wait for you Alex," Izzie says.

"Thank you. That ah... that helps," he says. He gives a small nod of the head before heading over to the table with everybody else.

 **30 minutes later**

"No way! You did not!" April gasps. The group were busy telling secrets about each other that nobody would know

"I did! I did!" Meredith laughs.

"It's true, I saw it!" Cristina confirms with a grin.

"You are so disgusting!" Callie laughs.

"I was an intern, I didn't know what else to do so I...I just threw up in a bed pan and left it there. I didn't know that Webber would accidentally put his hand in it," Meredith laughs.

Jo hears her phone ring and looks down at the caller ID, "It's the ADA. Excuse me," Jo says. She heads over to a quieter part of the house and answers the call.

"Jo Stadler speaking," she says.

"Hi Jo, it's Cassie Rouvard," Cassie says.

"Hi Cassie. Why are you calling on Christmas?" She asks curiously.

"Paul's Lawyer came to me today. He has decided to plead guilty," Cassie announces

"Wh... what?" Jo asks shocked. "Is this for real? Because he's admitted guilt and then recanted before. What's to say that won't happen again?" Jo questions.

"A Statutory declaration has been written and signed. We just have to wait for a judge to sentence him," Cassie explains.

"I can't believe it. Today of all days. It's... its..." Jo begins.

"It's a bit of Christmas magic. Now go enjoy the rest of your evening, it sounds like quite the event," Cassie replies. She could hear the laughter of Jo's drunk friends over the phone.

"It certainty is. Thank you. And merry Christmas," Jo replies. A moment later she hangs up the phone and walks back over to the table while looking gobsmacked.

"Jo, what happened? Are you okay?" Arizona asks as the laughter in the room subsides.

Jo rapidly nods her head, "Ah yeah."

"Okay, good," Arizona smiles.

"Today Paul decided that he was pleading guilty. He's signed a statutory declaration. It's a Christmas miracle. Like a real life freaking Christmas miracle," Jo says unbelievably.

"That's um... wow. That's amazing," they all agree. Jo bends down and picks up Phoebe from her rock 'n' play and begins to rock Phoebe in her arms.

"When I was a kid I never believed in Christmas miracles. I did use to wish for them when I was younger. I'd wish for a family to love me and that never happened so I stoped believing and wishing for them. I think I was seven... maybe even 6. But now I have a family with all of you and I know that all those years spent wishing and hoping weren't for nothing. My miracle was just waiting for the perfect time and the perfect people and it didn't want to settle. And I'm so happy that it didn't, because now I have a family with you all. A beautiful, beautiful family," Jo says while looking up at everybody, "and now it's just all falling into place," Jo smiles while looking down at Phoebe.


End file.
